The Beautiful Gate

AHHH...Life in the Country

2012-01-30T13:36:00.000-08:00

Well, it's sorta the country. I mean, we have a septic tank. Does that qualify as "country living"? (Which I think needs emptying because it smells kind of funny around here. Though I suppose it could be because we are "upwind" of a horse farm. Randy says it's the neighbor's tank but I think that's just wishful thinking on his part. How is anyone supposed to know anyway? Do they have gages that let you know when they are full or does one just "wing it" and hope for the best? Oh well, as long as I'm not the one emptying it. Plus, I think I'll make sure I'm gone that day. You know, so I won't get in the way and all that.) Another reason that I think it qualifies as "country" here is because there are no streetlights anywhere. Nary a one. When it gets dark, it's black as pitch. If I go out in the evening and forget to turn on the porch light, I can forget about finding my way back home, too. After living in the city all my life I was clueless as to what true darkness is. Good for sleeping though...or it would be if that darn wolf would just shut up. Randy swears up and down that there are no wolves out here but Michaela and I remain unconvinced. After all, my nephew lives in the same town and there was a bear strolling through his yard a while back. We all know that where there are bears, there are wolves, right? Coyotes too.

The REAL reason I know it's the country is that there is no trash pickup. Yep, gotta pick up your own trash and bring it to the dump. They call them "dump runs" and it's what we do for excitement around here. As in, "Hey guys, you wanna go on a dump run?" The dump is only open on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays so you have to time things just right. Like, you wouldn't want to change the kitty litter on a Sunday or anything like that.

Compost pile you say? What's that?

I DO have to change litter boxes now. Michaela got a kitten and mom got the litter box. "After all, Mom, I'm only eight you know. Do you know any 8-year-olds that change litter boxes?" I tried to think of a few but came up blank, so I gave in gracefully and only gagged about twenty times during the first cleaning. Not bad for a newbie. (Kittens are FOUL little beasties, let me tell ya. They put puppies to shame...even puppies with Giardia.)

I wonder if puppies can be trained to use litter boxes too? Actually, I wonder if puppies can be trained at all at this point. My carpet wonders, too.

Speaking of carpets, I caught the puppy and the kitten working in tandem the other day unravelling the carpet on my stairway. I KNOW McKookenstein was the culprit who instigated the whole thing but Skittles happily joined in. There was no paw twisting involved. I caught them redhanded and they didn't even have the decency to look ashamed of themselves. They chewed up the corner of a new area rug too... before the price tag was even off of it.

I wonder if it's okay for a kitten to eat puppy food and a puppy to eat kitten food?

Tomorrow is the Big Day

2012-01-13T14:58:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow is moving day! We are all packed up and ready to go! I just wanted to let everyone know that I won't have an Internet connection for the next week (or a bit more) so I won't be able to respond to any e-mails or comments. Thank you all for your kind words and support this past month. I'll be back on Blogger in about two weeks and am looking forward to catching up on my blogging and reading!

My puppy already broke in the carpet at the new house. We weren't there for five minutes and he lifted his leg. Can you believe that? I only got to enjoy a squeaky clean carpet for 5 minutes! Good thing God gave him such a cute face I tell ya. He has a huge yard to "go" in but he waits until he gets into the house. Go figure.

Be back soon!

A Much Needed Break

2011-12-15T07:46:00.000-08:00

My original intention was to get all the posts on the seven deadly sins up before Christmas but it looks like this will be impossible due to lack of time. Michaela has been out of school all week due to a terrible stomach bug and I am packing stuff for the move. It's hectic around here.

Well, I might not be able to post about the seven deadly ones right now but I'm sure getting plenty of opportunity to conquer them! Sorry about the delay. I'll tackle the remaining sins after things settle down a bit around here.

I hope everyone is having a blessed Advent!

Sabbath Moments

2011-12-10T06:02:00.000-08:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments we let go and let God and live in the present moment.

We put in an offer on a house and it was accepted. It's a small cape with a pretty yard and if all goes well the closing will be on December 30th. We are very excited! I just wanted to share a few pictures:

The yard needs some work but the house itself was completely renovated inside and is in pristine condition. We are really looking forward to moving in!

My apologies for the link on wrath and anger in my last post. The article was excellent but after looking around the site I decided to remove the link.

I hope everyone is having a blessed Advent!

Wrath versus Anger

2011-12-09T15:26:00.000-08:00

I prefer the term wrath rather than anger when speaking of this deadly sin. Wrath denotes a form of rage while anger is an emotion that can, if it is just, bring about good. As in the case of acedia and sloth, wrath and anger can mean two separate things. When we think of the term wrath we imagine an  anger out of proportion to its cause. The deadly sins have been watered down a bit over the years and I believe we may have somewhat lost their true meaning as in the case of sloth/acedia. Acedia was the sin the early church wrote about but this was changed to sloth eventually. This is also the case with wrath. Though the two are used interchangeably, I think wrath conveys the true definition of this deadly sin (Latin - ira) and we could consider anger a little offshoot of the much bigger sin of wrath. It's like comparing a forest fire with the flame from a match stick - one is far easier to put out than the other. Both can burn you if you get careless though.

Wrath:
1. strong, stern, or fierce anger; deeply resentful indignation; ire.

2. vengeance or punishment as the consequence of anger.

Anger: a strong feeling of displeasure or hostility.

I liked the comparison of words denoting the various degrees of anger I found at http://www.thefreedictionary.com/anger because this expresses the point I'm trying to make when defining the two words and their offshoots:

Synonyms: anger, rage, fury, ire, wrath, resentment, indignation

These nouns denote varying degrees of marked displeasure. Anger, the most general, is strong displeasure: vented my anger by denouncing the supporters of the idea.

Rage and fury imply intense, explosive, often destructive emotion: smashed the glass in a fit of rage; directed his fury at the murderer.

Ire is a term for anger most frequently encountered in literature: "The best way to escape His ire/Is, not to seem too happy" (Robert Browning).

Wrath applies especially to anger that seeks vengeance or punishment.

Resentment refers to indignant smoldering anger generated by a sense of grievance: deep resentment that led to a strike.

Indignation is righteous anger at something wrongful, unjust, or evil.

                                                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In terms of sin, it's clear that wrath is more than simply anger. Wrath is a distortion of anger. True anger seeks justice, wrath seeks vengeance. There's a big difference there. An anger that stems from a yearning for justice motivates, wrath annihilates. Anger properly channeled can build, wrath destroys. Anger can be merciful, wrath usually abhors mercy. Anger often stems from a love that seeks to change things, wrath from hatred. Righteous anger has boundaries, wrath very few. Righteous anger condemns the behavior, wrath condemns the person. In a nutshell, anger has its good points at times but wrath takes anger and becomes destructive instead of constructive.

Some of the signs and symptoms of wrath (unjust anger):
~ vengeful thoughts and behavior
~ irritability
~ fear
~ manipulative behavior
~ depression (can sometimes be a symptom of repressed anger)
~ mood swings
~ impatience
~ addictions (can be outlets for suppressed anger)
~ being overly sweet or too nice (weird but true sometimes)
~ compulsive behaviors
~ destructive behaviors such as road rage
~ insomnia
~ "bad" thoughts that pop up often (the anger has to go somewhere)
~ chronic tardiness
~ passive aggressive traits
~ difficulty forgiving
~ neck and back problems ( anger makes people stiff and more vulnerable to injuries)
~ chronic illnesses and illness in general (stress compromises the immune system)
~ heart problems
~ strokes

Anger may not be the direct cause of all health issues but it certainly aggravates them. Humans are both body and soul and stress definitely affects our health. Whether anger is sinful or not depends on the will. If the will consents to the anger then this is when sin comes into play.

The opposing virtues to anger/wrath are meekness and patience. The more someone practices patience, the stronger this virtue gets. We all have daily opportunities to develop this virtue - during traffic jams, in long lines at stores, dealing with cranky customers, taking care of children, etc...

If I were to recommend Scripture passages for the battle against anger, the Psalms would win hands down. We find reflected in the Psalms every emotion under the sun and I believe praying the Psalms gives us a safe place to release our own emotions without harming ourselves or others.

Empathy is another weapon against anger. When we place ourselves in someone else's shoes and understand that they are wounded just like us it takes the sting out of anger. As with envy, it's important to pray for those who have offended us in some way.

What about repressed anger? Again, the Psalms are a good way to deal with this. Along with the Psalms, I recommend the Rosary or a prayer that brings you to a place of peace. Here's what I do:
First, I invoke the Holy Spirit and ask Him to enlighten my heart and mind. I usually follow this with the Rosary though sometimes I use a word or phrase such as "Jesus, Son of God, have pity on me." I do this until my thoughts are calm and I feel God's presence. Then I simply let the Lord work. When "stuff" bubbles up, I just let it. Tears sometimes come and they are very healing tears. I know I'm done when my body starts butting in and clamoring for attention and I don't feel God's presence as much. Lastly, I hand everything over to the Lord and thank Him.

Be angry but do not sin; do not let the sun set on your anger, and do not leave room for the devil.
                                                                                    Eph. 4:26-27

Suppressed, Repressed, Oppressed, Depressed - The Many Shades of Anger

2011-12-06T17:55:00.000-08:00

Anger, also known as wrath, is the deadly sin I'm tackling this week. This capital sin is one I've
struggled with over the past ten years in the form of "repressed" anger. Outwardly, I am very mild
mannered and if someone had told me years ago that I had a problem with anger I probably would
have laughed. "Me? But I rarely lose my temper!" And that would be true...I didn't get angry very much.

You can imagine my surprise when the Lord decided to reveal that I most certainly DID have a problem with anger. As a matter of fact, I was a very angry girl (and girl, not woman, is the right term here) inside and the Lord was about to start dredging this stuff up. Underneath the sweet exterior there was a raging volcano just waiting to explode some day. I soon became aware that the question wasn't so much "Who was I angry at?" as "Who wasn't I angry at?" I didn't even realize I was angry at anyone. (I prefer "angry at" to "angry with" because "angry with" almost seems to imply that the other person is angry too.) So, not only was I mad at half the world, come to find out...I was even angry at myself.

Uhm...I was even mad at God for creating me. I know that sounds pretty bad but... it is what it is. I was angry at the Lord of the entire universe, the Author of Life himself. Of course, I didn't know this all at once...it was revealed gradually over a period time. First, God showed me that I had learned to completely "shut down" my anger as a child because I wasn't "allowed" to get angry. The thing is - people can't totally "shut down" their anger without harming themselves, can they? Not without God. Even to this day I struggle with calling anger what it is. I sometimes have to ask God what this emotion is I'm feeling. If we think of the words suppressed, oppressed, repressed, and depressed we see the word "pressed" in all of them. Anger is crushing, pressing, and heavy and that's exactly how I often felt inside. If we aim it at others we crush them and if we aim it at ourselves we crush ourselves. People can only handle a certain amount of pressure before it takes its toll.

Walking through the steps of forgiveness with the Lord, we worked in this manner:

First He helped me forgive others. This took a long time because I often didn't even know I harbored resentment toward anyone. Next, I had to forgive Him. And finally, I had to forgive myself (which we are still working on). Hiding beneath my anger was a boatload of hurt and pain and we worked (and continue to work) through this as well. It's not uncommon for those raised in dysfunctional families to suppress their emotions like this and to have to deal with the repercussions later on in life.

Some would say that when we are angry it's better to "let others have it" rather than suppress it. To "let it fly" and to heck with the consequences. The trouble with this is that the consequences of being on the receiving end of this type of anger can be tragic because everyone suffers the brunt of it. Those who "let others have it" do indeed pile their anger on others while still keeping it themselves at the same time. Anger is one of those things that grows and spreads when you share it too generously.

Anger turned outward can bring about oppression, while anger turned inward can bring on depression. Neither of these is healthy, both harm people. Anger can also bring on physical illnesses. Stress really IS a killer.

In my next post I'll list the signs and symptoms of this deadly sin and discuss ways to overcome it.

Sabbath Moments

2011-12-03T05:13:00.000-08:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. Come check out Colleen's site and read some of the other Sabbath Moments linked there!

We've had very warm weather the past few weeks- Springlike with temperatures in the sixties! I've even been able to leave the slider open for a while each day! Usually by this time of the year it's pretty cold and I'm enjoying this gorgeous weather while it lasts. We are doing some house hunting. We've looked at a few houses in a nearby town and have an appointment to look at another one tomorrow. I hope it's as pretty as it looks online. It sits on a two acre lot and is just a couple of minutes away from a lake. After living in a condo for so long we are looking forward to having land of our own. Maybe I'll finally get a chance to plant a garden of my own (and that makes me smile) soon!

I'm caught between laughter and horror while writing the series on the seven deadly sins this past month. On one hand it's humorous how blind I can be, on the other hand I'm a teeny bit horrified by the amount of work still ahead of me. No wonder the Lord impressed the words "Put your hands to the plow" upon me because I have the sinking suspicion that I was sitting beside the plow in his eyes. Being a bit dense when it comes to where I am spiritually, it has even crossed my mind that I may have been laying down next to the plow. No doubt God thinks he's being pretty funny by inspiring me to post on the seven deadlies...He knew what I'd find. To be honest, I often find the means He uses to reveal things about myself (that I'd maybe prefer to ignore?) rather humorous too. I admire his gentleness.

Speaking of humor, I loved your new book, Victor! Thank you for all the laughs!

Facing Off with Envy

2011-12-02T09:28:00.000-08:00

Envy is sorrow when faced with the talents, gifts, material goods and blessings of others. Envy isn't looking at others and noticing their gifts and virtues. Emulating someone is not envy. Looking up to someone is not envy. Wanting what they have AND feeling sad or wishing they did not have it is envy. Looking upon someone as a hero or model is good and can help us by motivating us to improve ourselves. Saints come to mind here and having a saint as a role model can help one progress in virtue. There's humility in looking up to someone else. Humility looks up, envy looks down. This makes perfect sense since one is from heaven while the other is from hell. The humble person may try to emulate his or her hero, an envious person has no heroes because envy distorts truth and seeks to strip the heroic qualities away from others. Humility applauds, envy belittles.

Peter Kreeft, in his book Back to Virtue, has this to say about envy: Envy removes joy because envy is the opposite of gratitude, and gratitude is the seedbed of joy. This particular sentence stuck with me because it shows us one of the ways to combat envy ...gratitude. Cultivating a grateful heart is one of the first steps toward living a life of joy and peace. One of the ways we can do this is by meditating on God's deep and individual love for each and every one of us. In God's eyes we are each unique and utterly irreplaceable. Every single person on this planet has a mission and purpose that is unique to that person. No other person can do this particular "job for God" because they are not equipped for it. I can't fulfill your mission and you can't fulfill mine. We live in a culture that has lost it's respect for the sanctity of human life and the end product of this "ingratitude" is a society that sees people as easily replaced. Simply being immersed in such an atmosphere can result in feeling unlovable and disposable. God, on the other hand, sees everyone as "special". He loves us so much that He refuses to live without us and has gone so far as to have a place in heaven waiting for each one of us. He even tells us this is so! We are the ones who reject Him... He NEVER rejects us. Pure love is incapable of rejecting anyone. When we begin to really understand and trust in the immensity and purity of this love a grateful heart becomes very easy to cultivate.

While writing these posts on the seven deadly sins I have noticed a common thread that weaves through them :

Fear.

Another blogger commented on this too. The seven deadly sins seem to be fear-based for most of us. Fear of not being lovable, fear of not measuring up, fear of our own sinfulness, fear that, because there IS a hell, then maybe we could just possibly end up there. Perfect love casts out fear and this is the reason that I believe meditating on God's love is the surest path of healing for us. When we grow in the knowledge of God's tremendous love for us gratitude comes easily and a grateful heart is a loving heart.

Along with practicing the virtue of charity, envy can be opposed by meditating on Scripture passages that speak of God's great love for his people as a whole and for the individual person. I'll list a few Scripture verses that are helpful at the end of this post. Another thing that I think may be helpful to those battling against envy is understanding that other people make us holier. It's very difficult to grow in holiness alone. One of the ways we grow in virtue is through our interactions with others. Also, when we help others grow in holiness...we grow in holiness. God likes it when we ask Him to make saints out of others. I ask him to do this all the time because God loves to answer this particular prayer. One of the drawbacks of living in such a competitive world is that it can pit us against one another if we allow it to. This is not God's way but man's way. God wants us to help one another grow in holiness. Praying for those we envy is very helpful in overcoming this capital sin.

Here are some helpful Scripture passages on love and gratitude:
~ John 3:16
~ Eph 2: 4-5
~ Rom. 8: 37-39
~ Jer. 29:11
~ Psalm 86
~ 1 Jn 4: 9-11
~ Gal. 2:20
~ Psalm 136
~ Col. 2: 6-7
~ Heb. 12:28-29

The Sad Face of Envy

2011-11-29T15:42:00.000-08:00

As a moth gnaws a garment, so doth envy consume a man.
                                            St. John Chrysostom

Envy is sorrow at another's good. No wonder very few people admit to envy... even the definition sounds terrible. It's hard to believe we actually may become sorrowful when good things happen to others, or if others have special gifts and talents, but most of us have been here at some point. As a child and young adult I remember envying others a lot. I would actually feel sad and wish that they did not have the gifts they had. Envy is one of the first things that God worked out of me and he did this by showing me his love. Once we understand the greatness of God's love for us envy tends to fall by the wayside because we understand the one true need in our life is God himself and that this gift is given to everyone without exception. Many of the seven deadly sins are fear based and envy is one of these. The problem with envy is that it is completely lacking in charity. It not only sorrows because someone else has been blessed in some way, it wishes the person had not received the gift or blessing. It may even wish ill on others. I started this post with the quote from St. John Chrysostom because of the truth it contains... envy consumes a person from within if it is not stopped in its tracks.

Envy is a sin against charity. Love seeks good for others, envy the opposite. One common sign that envy is at play is when you hear someone praise a person and then proceed to rip them apart. For instance:
"Don't you just love Mabel?! She is so talented! Still, it's just terrible that she doesn't know how to keep those children of hers in line. As smart as she is you would think that her mothering skills would be better. And did you see that AWFUL dress she wore to the wedding? It matched that plaid sofa she's got in her living room! Bless her heart! That woman has no taste...(yap, yap, yap)." The conversation goes on and by the end it is clear that Mabel is one slothful/ugly/mean/crazy/ungrateful, but don't forget talented, woman in the eyes of the speaker. Gossip often has its roots in envy.

Spiritual envy goes one step further. It actually sorrows over another's relationship with God. I found this quote by St. John of the Cross at Portiuncula: the Little Portion and it gives an example of just how unloving envy can be:
"Certain beginners feel disappointed when they perceive the goodness of another. They suffer from profound envy and can hardly bear it when they realize that someone else is ahead of them on the spiritual path. They would rather not hear another be praised. When they find that another's virtues are being celebrated, they can't stand it and are compelled to contradict them. Because no one is saying such great things about them, their annoyance grows; they yearn for preference in all things."
                                                                                         St. John of the Cross

Envy is dangerous because it leads to so many other sins - detraction, calumny, lies, uncontrolled anger, and other sins against charity.

Here are some of the signs and symptoms of envy:
~ bitterness
~ fault finding
~ resentment
~ fear
~ low self-esteem
~ depression (a note: depression can have physical causes too so this takes discernment)
~ judgmental attitude toward others
~ contempt for others
~ lying
~ gossiping
~ detraction
~ slander
~ ingratitude
~ a lack of peace and joy

Similar to the distortion pride brings, those who struggle with envy have a warped view of God, themselves, and others. All the deadly sins distort truth in some way and envy does it with a vengeance. If sloth makes it seem as if one is constantly trudging through water, envy is like stumbling through the rough waters after a storm and then throwing down stones in hopes of making the way more difficult for others. I say this because sloth has no storms whereas envy is filled with them. One is more apathetic than the other. Those who are envious end up walking alone because envy (like pride) is against unity and God is all about unity. Sloth may not even notice that someone is next to them while envy is perfectly aware that someone is with them and resents it. Sloth is more apt to sin through omission, envy - commission. Both are deadly.

It probably comes as no surprise that envy's opposing virtue is charity. This in itself shows the deadliness of envy. In my next post I'll write about some practical ways to tackle envy. Practicing the virtue of charity is helpful but what I found extremely helpful in this area is meditating on the love of God. Gratitude is another powerful weapon against envy and I'll speak more about this in my next post. I'll also get into what envy isn't because this deadly sin can be confusing at times.

Need or greed?

2011-11-24T08:52:00.000-08:00

A few years back I wouldn't have written these posts on the seven deadly sins one right after the other. I think I probably would have become a bit discouraged at what I found and probably would have made a million excuses for my behavior. I'm good at that. As a matter of fact, I had to ask the Lord for the grace to take a good look at myself without getting upset because I really wanted the truth...but not truth without the mercy that is necessary for examining oneself. The point is to recognize where I need to
improve but to do it without anxiety, trusting that the Lord will provide the grace for an honest examination of my heart. I have learned the hard way that trying to push before it's time to push just stops all progress and sometimes causes despair. I have had to learn (and am still learning) to be gentle but firm with myself. To not be so spiritually greedy, wanting it all at once, but to slow down a bit and learn what the Lord is trying to teach me about both myself and Him.

Thinking about greed this week, I have realized that most of us live in a time and place where it's hard NOT to be greedy. We live in a society that breeds discontent. Companies promote a "must have" mentality through their advertising and sales tactics. What used to be "wants" have become "needs" and people are often judged today by what they have rather than who they are. While there is nothing wrong with having a few extras, do we really improve the quality of our lives when we add the "latest, greatest, thing" to our households? Or are we trying to distract ourselves in some way? Are we happier today than our grandparents were in the past?

The day after Thanksgiving has been termed "Black Friday" and when I consider this name I can't help but think how fitting it is. The fact that it comes right after Thanksgiving just seems to add to the day's darkness. There's something very ugly about Black Friday and something very sad too. Over the years, many stores have started opening up earlier and earlier and, now, some even open up their doors on Thanksgiving Day itself. Where does this frantic consumerism end?

I wonder what God thinks about Black Friday? I was wondering about that today after reading a post by another blogger. Food for thought. Instead of being thankful for what we have, we want more. Sounds like a good definition of greed, doesn't it?

Here are some of the signs and symptoms of greed:
~ lack of trust in God
~ fear
~ a distrust of others
~ being dissatisfied with one's life
~ a pessimistic outlook on things
~ hoarding
~ being manipulative
~ a worldly outlook and a spiritual dullness
~ stinginess (tightfisted with money and goods)
~ boredom
~ ingratitude

Greed's opposing virtue is liberality (generosity). The generous giving of one's time, money, or goods to those in need is the way to overcome greed. Praying for an increase in the virtue of charity is key when tackling this vice. I find praying the Rosary and reading Scripture very helpful when it comes to greed. It helps combat the spirit of worldliness that we carry.

More is Never Enough - Greed

2011-11-21T12:27:00.000-08:00

This week I am trying to root out greed, also known as avarice. Though it cannot be overcome in a week, simply being aware that greed may still be a part of my life is a step in the right direction. After all, acknowledgement of our failings leads to repentance and forgiveness. Sin cannot be forgiven if one does not admit that he or she needs forgiveness. Admitting our faults is a basic requirement. I can go through my life seemingly unaware that I am affected by the seven deadly sins but this would be feigned ignorance on my part because with conversion comes the light to know oneself and this grace cannot be denied easily. If I look away each time the Lord taps me on the shoulder asking me to look more deeply into my heart I will pay a heavy price for that turning away some day. Better to search here than in Purgatory. It's a lot less painful to do it here on earth. Maybe not painless but certainly less painful.

Greed is the inordinate desire for money or earthly goods. We see manifestations of this capital sin everywhere we look in today's society, a good example being the avarice that gripped our large financial institutions a few years back to such an extent that they needed government bailouts to stay afloat. An article I read when this happened said the downfall of our financial institutions was "bad banking decisions" but the truth is that greed was the culprit here and many of the banks have continued basing their banking practices on greed rather than using money justly. Good old common sense tells us where this will land us once again.

A hunger for power may be one of the more dangerous manifestations of greed. We see the damage dictators have wrought in our century but ordinary people can be "little dictators" too. Some folks lord it over their families and run their household with an iron hand that brooks no disobedience. Right or wrong is not the issue here because a "little dictator" does not respect the free will of others. Greed and pride make a volatile mixture. If gluttony causes a narrowing of the spirit, the mixture of greed and pride bring about a deadly spiritual rigidity that is difficult to pierce. Pride believes it is always right and greed walks all over others to get what it wants. And after it gets what it wants... it wants more. They are very dangerous partners.

Greed is often fear based and uses the goods of the earth as a "physical" blockade of the heart. Greed does not trust God or others. Nor does it trust itself. It uses "stuff" as protection and "lording it over others" as proof that it is self-sufficient but once these things are taken away it becomes obvious that this is not the case. Greed is the refusal to entrust oneself into God's hands... which stems from fear. The problem is that we must learn to trust God totally. The more greedy we are, the more painful our separation from this earth at death will be because dying well requires an complete abandonment of ourselves into the hands of God. If we trust things more than God this poses a big problem, doesn't it?

Greed is unhappy because it confuses "having" with "being". Because it confuses these two it always seeks more because what it has is not enough to fill what can only be filled by God.

In my next post I'll write about some of the signs and symptoms of greed and about greed's opposing virtue.

Dainty Eating Habits?

2011-11-18T11:21:00.000-08:00

I have to admit that I don't know as much about gluttony as I thought I did. Most of the information I had on this sin was from Peter Kreeft's book Back to Virtue and a book I read a while back called The Seven Deadly Sins (I forgot the author's name). I don't know why I thought it was as simple as overeating or drinking too much...I should have known there was much more to it.

The easy definition of gluttony is eating or drinking inordinately. Who hasn't been guilty of this sin at times? Very few of us I'm sure. For those who say, "Wait a minute! I never overeat or drink too much!" I have some bad news for you (well, it was bad for me at least):

According to St. Thomas Aquinas, gluttony consists of :
~eating food that is too luxurious
~eating too much food
~eating daintily (fussiness about food preparation)
~ eating at inappropriate times (for example too much snacking at night or between meals)
~eating too eagerly

Ouch.

I have done most of these things. I've definitely shovelled food down my throat without paying much attention to what I was doing. I've eaten at inappropriate times too. Though these things may seem nitpicky, St. Thomas warns us about each of these because gluttony generates other sins. Plus, it is selfish. I guess in our day many of us consume too much of the world's goods. As if the above definition is not enough, gluttony can also carry over to areas other than eating or drinking.

What are some of the signs and symptoms of gluttony?
~ mindless eating
~ hiding or sneaking food
~ hoarding food
~ being picky about how your food is prepared
~ snobbery when it comes to food (only the best, costliest or most exotic food will do)
~ using food to soothe emotions
~ addictions (alcohol, drug, caffeine, etc...)
~ eating disorders
~ insomnia
~ ill health
~ lethargy
~ lack of zeal for God

The list could go on but these are the most obvious ones. I didn't put being overweight on the list because thin people can have as much of a problem with gluttony as heavy people. Gluttony is more about having a "malnourished" soul. Our selfish over consumption of the things of this world lead to a narrowing of the spirit and a lack of generosity toward others. This is conquered by praying for and practicing the virtues of temperance and charity. Fasting is a great help with this deadly sin. We can also pray for a heart that's rightly ordered because a disordered heart is one that is too focused on oneself.

I won't even get started on the subject of spiritual gluttony...I'll leave that to an expert - St. John of the Cross

You Mean Sloth Aggravates Gluttony?!

2011-11-15T10:51:00.000-08:00

Yes, sloth makes it harder to implement the remedies that need to be applied to tackle other sins.

This week I am working on the sin of gluttony. This doesn't mean that I've stopped battling against sloth or acedia - that one will likely be a lifelong process as it definitely seems to be the "king pin" when it comes to my spiritual life. As a matter of fact, acedia plays a big role in my ability to overcome certain sins, even more so than pride, though that too has a place in the bigger picture when it comes to sin. I have no idea whether these posts will even be helpful to others since everyone is unique but the possibility is there so I'll attempt to explain this connection:

Gluttony is by no means my worse fault but it is there to a degree. Maybe not so much in the area of my total food consumption as in my proclivity to addictions to certain foods (drinks too). My nemesis is ice cream. Diet Coke, too, when I don't put a hold on it. I could happily eat ice cream every single day...along with my Diet Coke. My ice cream eating is more than just a simple sweet tooth. By paying attention, I've noticed that I'm most inclined to open the freezer when I'm upset about something. I used to think that I just "liked" the taste, which I do, but it's more than that. I don't like when there is not a lick of ice cream in the house. I like to have it on hand "just in case". "Just in case of what?" you may ask.

Exactly.

Here's where the problem with sloth has adverse effects on my ability to conquer the other deadly sins. (Though sloth and acedia have slightly different meanings I am going to use the term sloth rather than acedia because sloth is used more often today and seems to have mostly replaced the word acedia.) Sloth says, "I'll work on gluttony tomorrow. Today is not a good day as I have a headache/cold/backache (pick your ache of choice...they all work just fine I've noticed). Surely God wouldn't deny me a sweet treat when I'm feeling so ill. Besides, I'm offering up my sufferings today and certainly that's more than enough. I mean, good grief, the size of my cross is enormous already! Anyone can see that. (We could get into talking about pride here as well...but I don't want to make it too complicated). And I also have soooo many things to do today. It's just not a good day to fast. I'll do it tomorrow when there's less on my plate for the day..."

I could go on and on but I'm sure you get my drift. It's probably more honest to simply say, "I'm not going to fast today" and forget all the self justification that goes along with sloth. I'm really good at justifying myself. Sadly, this just makes matters worse in the long run, as you can see.

Sometimes my attempts at justifying myself become so humorous that I laugh and wink at God. It's not that I'm trying to insinuate by my laughter that it's not important to overcome bad habits...it's my feeble attempts at excusing my actions that crack me up. How obvious they are to God! Do I really think He doesn't see right through this?

The point is: I have difficulty applying the remedy, in this case fasting and practicing the opposing virtue of temperance, because of the problems with sloth. How can I not laugh at the inanity of my dilemma? It's at times like these when I thank God for the sense of humor He has given me! How easy it would be to get upset about the tasks in front of me instead and throw my hands in the air. Except for one thing...giving up discounts grace and grace is more than capable of tackling the vices.

You can see at this point why I chose to tackle sloth first, in my case. If I tackled gluttony first it would be like trying to move water out of a bucket with a leaky cup. Obviously, the deadly sins take a lot longer than 7 weeks to overcome but writing about these sins is helping me to understand just how much of a part they have played in my life. Plus, I am learning a great deal about virtues to boot.

There is more to gluttony than just the over consumption of food and drink and I'll get to this in my next post. In this one, I wanted to show the interplay and the connection between certain sins such as gluttony and sloth. All the deadly sins are intertwined to a degree but don't let this make you feel overwhelmed because virtues are like this too and virtues are stronger because they come from God.

Sabbath Moments

2011-11-12T06:48:00.000-08:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment. Here are some of my special moments:

~ Going to morning Mass after I drop Michaela off at the bus stop. I really look forward to this. Praying the Rosary before Mass helps me to prepare my heart for Communion.

~ Our puppy is so funny! His antics keep us in stitches! Today we gave him a bath and he ran like a maniac through the house afterward. He's lovable, sweet natured, and full of energy. Very difficult to train though. He still thinks that the world is one giant chew toy...and bathroom. Oh well, there's a plus to all this - no doubt the folks who put out disinfecting wipes love me. And I love them too, of course. What else kills 99.99% of germs?

~ Beautiful "indian summer" weather this week. Wow!

~ I think my battle against sloth is going pretty well. This next week I am tackling gluttony! Wish me luck. Goodbye choco-caramel-vanilla swirl ice cream with heaping chunks of fudge. Sigh. Who invents these things anyway?

The Joy Thief

2011-11-10T14:23:00.000-08:00

Sloth is a joy stealer. Those who are encumbered by this deadly sin walk this world in a half-hearted fashion and I believe it is one of the biggest problems that this century is faced with. Those who are lukewarm almost always have a problem with sloth. Sloth is a spiritual torpor, a listlessness of the spirit that leads most often to sins of omission rather than sins of commission. Rather than confronting this joyless spirit head-on, many try to escape it by frantically rushing around in an attempt to outrun the heaviness in their hearts and the sword of sorrow hanging over their heads. This is where sloth gets ugly, for in trying to escape it we make matters worse. Sloth doesn't like to confront, it likes to avoid. It is a spiritual languor that says, "I still have time...I'll take care of spiritual matters tomorrow. Today I just have too many things to do - I have to get this shopping done, the game is on, these e-mails have to go out, my blog is waiting (hmmm), etc...

In other words, if a person's slothfulness gets bad enough they could procrastinate themselves right into hell. One of my favorite books is Back to Virtue by Peter Kreeft and I have this book in my "keeper" stack so I can reread it regularly. In this book, the author goes through each of the seven deadly sins in detail and explains why the beatitudes are an antidote to these sins. I was particularly struck by one of the paragraphs in his book where he says, "Sloth is the most depressing thing in the world. It is hell on earth. It finds our very highest joy - God himself - joyless. If Joy himself is joyless, where can we find joy? If salt has lost its saltiness, how can it be restored? If the very light in us is darkness, how great is that darkness?"

Sloth finds God joyless. Scary, huh? Now you know why I am tackling this one first. Sloth is sneaky, irresponsible (good remedies suggested here), and apathetic when it comes to God. I'm not sure I could imagine anything worse, could you?

Knowing God, Knowing Ourselves - Tackling Sloth

2011-11-08T10:31:00.000-08:00

In my last post I spoke about tackling the 7 Deadly Sins over the next 7 weeks in preparation for Christmas. This week I am tackling sloth in particular. I'll first go over a few of the signs or symptoms of sloth. This is not a complete list but it may be helpful for others who aren't quite sure how much of a problem this is in their lives. Sins often "ride upon the back" of other sins so it's useful to tackle one in a powerful way because when you overcome one that's a particular "trouble maker" in your life it often makes it easier to overcome other sins. Sort of like knocking the front pin down in bowling - if you hit it just right it will often take down others with it. For me, the head pin is sloth, so I'm tackling that one first. It can take some discernment to identify the head pin.

Sloth can be physical, spiritual, or both. Many times people don't think they are slothful because their lives are so busy but the truth is that over-activity CAN be as much as a symptom as under-activity. We so love to fool ourselves. The funny thing is...we are not always aware that we are deceiving ourselves. It's probably best to look at the quality of your output rather than the quantity. This goes for prayer, too - quality supersedes quantity. You want to get at the heart of the issue and surface appearances can be deceiving. A person can run around all day and still be slothful in the things that matter. It's helpful for those who are chronically ill (it was for me) to remember that quality counts over quantity. Sometimes people look upon those who are ill as slothful when nothing could be further from the truth.

In this post I am using a widely accepted definition of sloth. Sloth and acedia are often used interchangeably though they have slightly different meanings. Sloth is often thought of as mere laziness but it is more complicated than that. Laziness is more an effect of sloth. Here is a link which speaks about sloth in more detail. Thomas Aquinas said that sloth is "sluggishness of the mind which neglects to begin good...its evil is in its effect, if it so oppresses man as to draw him away from good deeds".

These are some of the signs and symptoms of sloth, especially spiritual sloth:
~ An aversion to prayer - this can be mild or great depending on how deeply rooted this vice is.
~ Aridity
~ Lack of zeal
~ Disorganization
~ Confusion (spiritual)
~ Apathy or discouragement
~ Boredom
~ Putting off tasks or leaving them undone without good reason
~ Sadness (melancholy)
~ Focusing too much on the past or the future

Some of these can also be signs of gluttony. So as God removes layers of dirt from your soul you might run into these symptoms again. Gluttony and sloth are often partners. I would also like to point out that I am referring to sin in this post not levels of prayer. A person can have an aversion to prayer when God is first leading them into deeper prayer such as contemplation but it's fairly easy to discern when this is the case because virtue steadily grows during these times and you don't get the feeling that you've hit a brick wall for an extended period of time. I've always thought that it's a good rule of thumb to first check and make sure that the fault isn't within you. There are layers to sin and God usually lifts these layers over time. The seven deadly sins are known as the roots of sin so removing these often takes many years. We can help with their removal to a degree, thankfully, by our disposition and our response to grace. Along with the proper disposition, God has provided a number of other remedies to help us along the way.

So, if we notice these signs, what can we do? God has given us so many ways of rooting out sin, here are some of the ways that I am tackling this vice:

- Praying specifically for the grace to overcome this: God does not refuse those who petition him with an honest heart, if anything, He gives more than the person has asked for. He will not be outdone in generosity. One of the reasons that I know that the Lord wants me to work on this particular fault is because of a word He gave me a while back, "Put your hands to the plow." I received this word numerous times so there was no doubt that He was calling me to respond in some way. He will not ask something of someone without supplying the necessary grace to overcome it. Further prayer confirmed the area He wanted me to tackle. God can make things very obvious if He chooses to. I sometimes have to request this (clarity) because I can be resistant at times to correction (spiritual pride). I'm being painfully honest here in hopes that somehow my words may be helpful to others.

- Going to Mass: Receiving the Eucharist often is a powerful remedy for all our ills. I am reading an excellent book called The Healing Power of the Eucharist by John H. Hampsch, C.M.F. that speaks about the spiritual, emotional, and physical healing that the Eucharist brings us.

- Adoration: Once again the healing properties of the Eucharist come into play here. Simply sitting in front of the Blessed Sacrament and soaking in the healing rays emanating from the Heart of Jesus. I am of the belief that every person is changed and receives healing during Eucharistic Adoration even if the healing is imperceptible to us.

- Reading the Bible: I am focusing on the Book of Wisdom this week and certain Gospel passages that will help me keep my eyes on Jesus and "put my hands to the plow".

- Practicing the opposing virtue: The opposing virtue of sloth is diligence. Exercising virtues builds your spiritual muscles. I have also been praying for prudence (wisdom) because this is a "kingpin" virtue. Another virtue which opposes sloth is charity.

I may do one more post on sloth since I think it may be helpful to dig a little deeper into this capital sin and I hope to post some links and helpful books. It's easy to be deceived by the rush, rush, nature of our society today into believing that sloth isn't a problem these days but I am convinced that it is a HUGE problem, more of one than we think.

Knowing God, Knowing Ourselves

2011-11-07T11:44:00.000-08:00

I titled this post Knowing God, Knowing Ourselves because the two walk hand in hand. Sin prevents us from knowing God as much as we should.The more we are purged of sin the more we come to know God and ourselves. We are always being purged and healed, each and every day, provided that we cooperate with God's graces. However, this cooperation is key. Without it, our souls stagnate and eventually backslide. A person cannot stay in one place spiritually, we either move forward or backward. Responding to the graces God gives us is crucial. He knows the condition of our souls far better than we do and guides us in the areas where we need to progress. And what constitutes progress? Simply this...growth in virtues. If we see this growth we know we are progressing. There's no way to write about these things without a certain amount of bluntness so I'll try to be direct.

Sometimes, I feel as if I have bumped into a "wall" spiritually. What seems to help me get past this is taking a long, hard, look at myself. If done with honesty, under the light of the Holy Spirit, the obstacle usually becomes apparent. For example, after scrutinizing myself last week it became obvious to me that I'm struggling with sloth lately, especially in my spiritual life. This is an area of weakness for me, maybe more so than the other deadly sins. Except pride, which we all have to work on constantly because, to put it bluntly...we like to make gods of ourselves. Some people may say that this isn't so, but this in itself is a sign of pride. It kind of works along the line of "if you think you are humble... you think too much of yourself ". The entire human race suffers from pride. It's a lot easier for God to work in this area if we accept this as the truth.

Back to sloth. How do I know I am having trouble in this area spiritually? For me (I don't know if this will be helpful to others) the symptoms are fairly clear:
~ I am vaguely "repulsed" by prayer. This means that I have to really force myself to pray.
~ Aridity in prayer
~ Lack of zeal for the things of God
~ Procrastination

For example, I don't really "feel" like praying, reading the Bible, or going to Mass lately. I feel either numb or mildly disgusted during prayer. Just wanting to get it over with so I can move on to something else. I seem to be lacking my usual zeal for God (as embarrassing as it is to admit). St. Padre Pio knew what he was talking about when he said, "Aridity is the fruit of our defects", that's for sure.

Seeing that there are 7 weeks left until Christmas I thought I'd tackle the seven deadly sins by working on one each week. I am starting with sloth since I seem to be so affected by it lately. Another reason I am beginning with sloth is that once this is moved out of the way (at least to a degree) it will be easier to work on the other sins. I am hoping that this will prepare me for Christmas... that Christ will have a clean heart to rest his head upon and that this "house" will have plenty of room for Him.

Each week I will write about the measures I am taking to overcome these sins. Wish me luck!

Or...

feel free to join in!

I Blog Jesus Award

2011-11-05T12:22:00.000-07:00

Many thanks to Jennifer at Faith and Family Connections for passing this award on to me! I loved this badge! I'm a frequent visitor to Faith and Family Connections and I highly recommend this site to those who are raising families. You can find topics such as prayer, the saints, and other subjects related to the Catholic Faith here. They also have crafts and activities for children! A great site!

This award was created by Monica at Equipping Catholic Families and is for blogging moms who:

~Strive for a stronger Faith and closer relationship with Jesus.

~Aspire to grow spiritually through a vocation as a "King's Kid"... a daughter of God, and a Catholic wife and mom.

~Seek to encourage others in their own spiritual journeys and Faith formation in their families through the Catholic training tools and gifts that they create and yes...through their blog.

I'd like to pass this award on to these special mothers who have touched my heart through their grace-filled blogs:

* Anne Bender at Imprisoned in my Bones - I have always loved this blog!
* Esther at A Catholic Mom in Hawaii - Another favorite!
* Colleen at Thoughts on Grace - Ditto! Both her blog and website are wonderful!
* Vicky at Creating with Wisdom - A new favorite!

Words cannot express how grateful I am for your friendship, Ladies, but I hope this award speaks for me. All four of you truly blog for Jesus and I have been immensely blessed through each of you. Thank you!

Sabbath Moments

2011-11-05T07:27:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the times when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment :

I wanted to share a picture that made me laugh! With most of the city without power this week I'm not sure how well this went over with some people but it sure tickled my funny bone!

Love it! We lost power again yesterday right after I went grocery shopping (Murphy's Law) and my husband sent me this picture from his cell phone. I'm glad people haven't lost their sense of humor :)

The kids went back to school yesterday. Is it rude to jump for joy? (Hey, at least I'm honest.) It's not that I don't enjoy having my house full of kids but quiet time gives me a chance to put my inner house in order. I went to Mass, prayed the Rosary, and had the opportunity to spend some extra time in intercessory prayer. I felt spiritually recharged after. Got power? Yes, thank you, Lord...I do.

My Dog is Buzzed

2011-11-03T11:29:00.000-07:00

My elderly dog was put on a new pain medication for his arthritis today and I could swear that he is buzzed. I just watched him try to get a drink of water and he had trouble lining up his head with the bowl. When he DID get it over the bowl his tongue missed the water at first. I only gave him a quarter of a tablet as the vet recommended so I was surprised at how odd his behavior is. I can only assume that it made his head fuzzy. It's quite funny to watch. Hilarious actually. (Down PETA!) At least I know he's getting a bit of relief! He's very old (fourteen) for his breed; they usually only live for about twelve years. Hopefully, he'll adjust to the new medication because the stuff he was on before bothered his stomach. I'm not sure bumping into things will help the arthritis though.

Don't ask me why I'm posting this.

It's this or scrubbing down the bathroom I guess.

Unfortunately, it's tough to post spiritual stuff with 4 girls under the age of nine running around here. Plus, there's only one bathroom...

Anyway, offering up high-pitched squeals and shrieks is helpful to the souls in purgatory, you know. I'm getting a lot accomplished despite how things look. Goes to show how looks can be deceiving, doesn't it?

I had to look up high-pitched on Google because I couldn't remember if it was one word or not. So, I tapped in high-pitched and Google suggested "high-pitched bowel sounds". Is it only me or are computers taking over the world lately?

As a side note, my husband says PETA means "people eating tasty animals". Unfortunately... he tells PETA that too.

And, yes, he's from Texas...

Life is still a bit crazy up here

2011-11-03T08:45:00.000-07:00

Things are improving slowly but there are almost a million homes still without power here in the Northeast. Amazing how much damage an early storm can do - the heavy, wet, snow was simply too much for the delicate infrastructure up here. The schools are still closed and there are downed power lines and trees littering our neighborhoods even after 5 days, despite help from our neighbors in Canada. Restaurants have been packed because folks have no way of keeping food refrigerated. The temperatures have been in the fifties during the day and twenties at night so storing perishables outside isn't really safe. Still, I think people are grateful that the temperatures aren't in the single digits like they were in the terrible ice storm a few years back. We had to wear hats and coats to bed that time and we could see our breath indoors! According to the linemen who have been restoring the electricity, this storm caused far more damage than the ice storm. It looked like a war zone here for a few days. It makes me realize that we are totally unprepared for a major emergency here in the Northeast.

You know what cracks me up? The daily lines for coffee up here! I never saw anything like it! We are a bunch of caffeine addicts in this country :) Makes me glad I keep my coffee intake down to about half a cup a day! Lol!

October Nor'easter Slammed Us

2011-10-30T16:46:00.000-07:00

New England is well known for its crazy weather but this particular storm caught most of us off guard. A big storm like this in October? Very rare. I'm not sure I've ever seen a storm like this. The snow was so wet and heavy that it took down trees, branches, and power lines throughout New England and over three million people are still without electricity. We were one of the lucky ones and our power was restored within 24 hours but most of our city is in the dark. It will be a week before some folks have electricity again. What's hard is that with temperatures in the twenties, no electricity means no heat for many people. I guess it's a little better than when the ice storm hit us a few years back, the temperature was in the single digits that time. We had to sleep with coats and hats on!

One of the power lines that leads to our building caught on fire during the storm. It was dropping sparks on the cars in our parking lot (we live in a condo) and was working its way to the building. The fire department came and looked at it but simply told us to call them if the line came down. I watched the fire worm its way down the wire and it made me quite nervous. "Lord," I prayed, "I'll never be able to get to sleep with that wire on fire so close to the building. Could you put it out, please?" Less than three minutes later a tree above the wire let go of a huge load of snow and the snow put out the fire. "Wow! Lord, you work quickly!" Fire wouldn't be my first choice when it comes to dying. Not that we get a choice but it never hurts to give the Lord a heads up.

The roads were cleared of snow fairly quickly this morning so we attended Mass ( dirty, because there was no hot water and nobody takes a cold shower when there's no heat in the house) and then went to my parents' house for breakfast since they have a gas stove. As we drove and looked around we were shocked by the damage the storm left in its wake. There were tree limbs and downed trees everywhere! On cars, houses, in the road...it was crazy! No one seemed to escape this storm unscathed. Heavy snow and high winds can cause a lot of damage. The clean up around here will take weeks... if not months.

It seems that we are constantly breaking weather records these past few years. What next? Tornadoes in the Winter?

Sabbath Moments

2011-10-29T07:40:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. Here are a few of my special moments this week:

~ My sister and I visited St. Joseph the Worker Shrine in Massachusetts this week. We went to Confession and visited the gift/bookstore while we were there. The store has a used book section and I hit the jackpot! Someone had just dropped off a huge stack of great books, some of which I had been wanting to read for a while, and I left with just about the whole stack! It felt like Christmas in October! I love when this happens! They sell the used books for dirt cheap and I would never have been able to buy them all new...well, not all at once anyway.

~ It snowed a few nights ago! When I woke up the next morning and looked outside I was awestruck by how beautiful the trees looked wearing their bright fall colors topped with a layer of white fluff. We don't usually get snow this early so it was a nice surprise. We are supposed to have a huge snowstorm tonight too! My puppy, Caesar, ate his first snowball and loved every bit of it!

~ After Mass Friday morning, I met a friend for breakfast and we spent an hour and a half talking, laughing, and simply enjoying each other's company. We've known one another since high school and try to get together regularly. Thank you, Lord, for good friends!

~ I enjoyed my break from blogging...maybe a little too much. I got a lot accomplished this week and am tempted to extend my blogging break a bit longer :) Not too long, though!

I hope everyone had a great week!

Fall Cleaning Break

2011-10-21T06:50:00.000-07:00

I'm taking a short break from blogging to do my fall cleaning. When the handprints on your walls start waving at you and the dust bunnies are having litters under your bed and in your closets it's a sign that your house is trying to tell you something. Be back soon!

A Link to a Great Post

2011-10-19T15:31:00.000-07:00

Barb at Suffering with Joy has written an excellent post on reading the Bible. I highly recommend reading her article How to Get More from Reading the Bible. She has also listed a number of resources that she has found helpful. Well worth checking this out!

Hey! I've got a bit of time on my hands...

2011-10-18T10:06:00.000-07:00

...anyone want me to +1 them for a while?

I need a "test market".

What's all this +1 Stuff About?

2011-10-18T08:47:00.000-07:00

What is the purpose of the +1 symbol I'm seeing everywhere lately? Does anyone know anything about it? Out of curiosity I tried to click on it a short while back but it said that only certain people had been selected to take part in it. Can anyone do it now? I can see that it's to recommend sites and articles but what exactly does it do? Raise your Google standing?

Yes, I'm looking for the logistics behind it.

Puff? You know "stuff", right?

Anyone?

Stylish Blogger Award

2011-10-17T14:09:00.000-07:00

Vicky at Victoria Leach - Portrait Art has passed on to me a Stylish Blogger Award. Vicky is a gifted artist and an incredibly sweet lady that I am honored to have met online. Many thanks for the award, Vicky!

One of the rules is to share 7 things about yourself and then pass the award along to 5 other bloggers. Here are seven things about me that you might not know:

1. I am a total bookworm and passed the bookworm gene down to my daughter. My parents owned a bookstore when I was a child and I was allowed to read as many books as I wanted to as long as I handled the book very carefully and did not crease it in any way. Randy bought me a Kindle last year because my books clutter up the house. I am currently deeply absorbed in a book titled The Night's Dark Shade: A Novel of the Cathars by Elena Maria Vidal who is also a blogger. The book is so engrossing that I went to sleep two hours later than planned Saturday night because I had a tough time putting it down.

2.When the Lord healed me of Myasthenia Gravis He threw in a couple of bonus healings that I was too embarrassed to mention before now. He healed a large cyst on my head that I had for twenty years...it was gone within three days of the healing service. I had never bothered having it removed because it required shaving an area of my scalp almost two inches wide and my hair is too fine and would not have covered the bald spot. He also healed my toenail fungus :) Yeah, I know...how gross! This cracked me up and made me realize that God has a very good sense of humor.

3. As strange as it may sound, shortly after these healings I mentioned above, God also healed a hip and foot problem I had since birth. The healing took place while I was reading the book The Third Floor Window by Colleen Spiro. Colleen had sent me a copy of her book...little did I realize the impact it would have on my life. God works in funny ways at times. My gait, while not perfect, is more like a regular person's now and I have much less back trouble. Weird but true. What is it with me and books, anyway? It was a book that first led me to attend a healing service in the first place.

4. For a couple of months after these healings took place my body was as flexible as a child's - it was remarkable! I was a teeny tiny bit disappointed when this extreme flexibility went away :)

5. My vision is terrible and stayed that way! Lol! If it weren't for the fact that I wear contacts (or glasses) I would be considered legally blind. (Thanks Mom and Dad!)

6. I love to doodle and to sketch but could not draw for many years because the Myasthenia Gravis had affected my hands so much. One of the things I did after being healed was that I started drawing again. Am I very good? No, but it brings me joy.

7. I cry when I write poetry about God. Am I very good? No, but it brings me joy :)

I'd like to pass this award on to :

~ Anne Bender at Imprisoned in My Bones
~ Colleen Spiro at Thoughts on Grace
~ Karinann at Daughter of the King
~ Esther at A Catholic Mom in Hawaii
~ Sarah at Harbor of Aloha
~ Barb at Suffering with Joy
~ Mary at Hope Echoes
~ Puff at Puff's Blog About Stuff
and
~ Victor at Time for Reflections

I cheated...it's only supposed to be passed on to 5 people, but I'm very nosy and like to know more about people. If you've already received it, please ignore :)

Simple Laws of Life - Joking Aside for a Moment

2011-10-13T08:45:00.000-07:00

All joking aside for a moment - my last post on how God makes saints out of "regular" people contains an element of truth to it. More than an element, actually. I use the term "regular" people loosely. In truth...there is no such thing as a "regular" person. That bald, chubby, man that you stood next to in the grocery store yesterday is a saint-in-the making. If you were to see his soul with the glorious indwelling of the Trinity you just might fall to your knees in wonder. We are, each and every one, children of the King. And the glory of God surrounds us. It's a good thing that God blinded us to a degree or not much work would get done here on earth. We would spend all our days lost in wonder at the glory of God, both in ourselves and in others. We are temples of the Holy Spirit and this is no small thing.

There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations - these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit - immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.
C.S. Lewis

Chew on that one for a while. Made me think twice about yelling at my child, that's for sure. I am likely screaming at a future saint. I came across this quote by C.S. Lewis last year and to say it has affected me is an understatement. I was floored by it. With a few simple words it puts life in its proper perspective. We may not see this splendor in others yet...but it is there.

God sanctifies his people and usually uses ordinary, everyday, circumstances to do so. I joked around in my last post about the means He uses to form a holy people for himself but in all actuality I was being truthful. The everyday circumstances of our lives (that may seem so pointless or monotonous in our eyes) have the ability to produce great saints if we cooperate with the grace God gives us. Virtues have the chance to flourish and vices can be overcome just by our day to day responses to the challenges the Lord allows to be thrown in our path. There are no circumstances on this earth that God cannot use as saint making material.

It's all saint making material...every single bit of it.

We choose whether to use it as such.

But you are "a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people of his own, so that you may announce the praises" of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.
1 Peter 2:9

Simple Laws of Life - How "Regular" People Become Holy

2011-10-13T07:14:00.000-07:00

I have learned a lot thus far during my years here on earth. Here are some of the lessons I've learned:

~ If you knock something off the counter in the bathroom it's almost a guarantee that it will fall into the toilet. Especially if it's a toothbrush or dental floss. This is God's way of teaching us "to be neat and close the seat".

~The grocery bags with the glass jars of red tomato sauce are always the ones that rip. This is God's way of teaching us not to swear.

~ Even if your house is mostly flooring, a new puppy will find the two carpets in your home and do his "business" on them. Pups like to "go" in comfort and carpets are softer and warmer on their paws. The chances of a puppy "going" on your rug rises to almost 99.9% if the puppy has diarrhea. This is God's way of teaching us humility. Picking up "dog poo" will do that (yes, humble you) after the 100th time. It also may be God's subtle way of hinting that you just might be a bit smellier than the dog and that it's time to go to Confession.

~ If you are in a terrible rush driving to an appointment that you waited until the last minute to leave the house for, you will most likely be stuck behind two elderly nuns off to do the convent grocery shopping and travelling at 15 miles per hour because they took a vow of poverty and the grocery store tempts them. Never try to pass said elderly nuns, they drive in "beastmobiles" or other very large sedans and take up most of the road. They'll throw you to the curb in a heartbeat. This is God's way of teaching us patience. Yes, and prudence also. Trust me on this one.

~ If a store is having a 75% off sale and you have a 25% off coupon do NOT, I repeat, do NOT, go to the store that rhymes with "Bohl's". This is a subtle tactic of Satan's to get you to spend money frivolously and works on most women because women believe that 75 and 25 equals 100. The devil is a liar, though, and makes the 75 and 25 add up to just 76. How he does this I'll never know... but the Lord allows it to help teach us to be good stewards of money and to rid us of greed. (And, personally, God, I think this one is very unfair for teaching us wisdom. A simple two-by-four over the head might work more quickly.)

~ If you decide to take "just a quick dash down to the store" with greasy hair, no make up, and ratty sweatpants, you are likely to run into every old school friend (male and female) you've ever known but haven't seen for twenty years and the words, "Boy, did she go downhill..." will echo through your ears as you stand in the longest checkout line in history. God allows this to teach you not to be vain. It also teaches you not to be a glutton as you realize that "just maybe" that pint of "Ben and Edy's Maximum Choco-power Caramel Swirl Delite" is NOT a necessity...not even on "those" days. He also uses this to teach you that you actually DO NOT have ESP and cannot read the minds of others. This is a great one (in God's eyes) because it kills three birds with one stone.

P.S. (Those coupons don't work at "Lacy's" either. Not even at "J.C. Pennypinchers".)

I would feel bad for a robber...

2011-10-12T09:45:00.000-07:00

...if he picked me to mug. Yesterday, Randy and I headed to his work's credit union which is about twenty minutes away. You have to take a toll road to get there. About 30 seconds before we got to the tollbooth, Randy glanced over at me:

"Hon, you got any money?"

"Uhmmm, nooo, how 'bout you?"

"Nothing in these pockets 'cept lint."

"Well, lint won't work. You think they take debit cards?"

"Don't think so. Can't you scrape something out of that bottomless pit you call a purse?"

"I'll try." So we pulled over into the breakdown lane while I started digging into the pit purse. Ten balled up gum wrappers later I handed Randy my "treasure".

"That's only 70 cents! That's all the change you have?!"

"Yup."

"Dig deeper, please. We can't turn around, there's no place to do that!" I scraped up three more pennies from the dregs of my purse and handed it to him.

"Well...here goes nothing." We pulled up to the tollbooth, heads hanging, and showed the lady our 73 cents. The three pennies had little bits of gum encrusted on them. The lady frowned down at it and handed us a bill for $1.50. Red-faced we drove away.

Moral of the story:

When you go on trips that require toll money, don't forget to bring the kid who collects all your spare change and keeps it in her little Hello Kitty coin purse.

And, just as a side note for those whose deepest desire in life is a career as a tollbooth operator - you must past a lip curling and eyebrow waggling exam to apply. This is not an option....it's a requirement. Just a friendly reminder for all you tollbooth operator wannabes out there.

Sabbath Moments - The "Good Thief"

2011-10-08T06:02:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment. Here are a few of them :

This is "Porky" and she lives in the woods next to our home. She, along with "Foxy Roxy" (sorry, no picture) are the neighborhood "pets" (yes, this is an anagram).

And this little guy below? Well, I'll let him speak for himself:

I chew on everything!

      Including Mommy's books. That's what she gets for leaving them in piles behind the sofa. Slob! I
      steal them and drag them under the sofa sometimes. I steal from her purse when she forgets to put it
      on the table as she comes in. I can't get it when she puts it in the fridge. Why does she do that? She
      says it's hormones but Daddy says she's been doing it all her life. I believe him because I saw her
      put ice cream in the cabinet once. Plus, she loses her keys every single day. (I help her lose them.)

I can hear you even when I'm asleep. These ears aren't just for show you know!

She won't know what hit her when I wake up! I better hide my grin!

Five minute naps are too long! Now, where did I hide Michaela's new shoes?

I am curious...

2011-10-07T17:03:00.000-07:00

Am I the only one who is still having trouble commenting on the sites of my fellow bloggers? Every single day at least half the comments I leave do not go through. Is this happening to anyone else? It was suggested to me that the problem may be with my browser, Internet Explorer, so if anyone else is having this problem I'd be interested in hearing from them. Thanks.

Though it wouldn't surprise me if I'm the problem. Technology and I never did get along very well...

Community of Catholic Bloggers

2011-10-07T15:51:00.000-07:00

I posted at the Community of Catholic Bloggers today. If you have not yet visited this new site, I invite each of you to come on over and check it out. It's a community effort and we would love to have your feedback! Thanks!

Random Thoughts on God - Sacrifice and Suffering

2011-10-05T10:56:00.000-07:00

"The quintessence of love is sacrifice and suffering. Truth wears a crown of thorns. Prayer involves the intellect, the will, and the emotions." St. Faustina

~ This is one of my favorite quotes from the diary of St. Faustina. We live in an age where people run from suffering of any sort. We dash frantically about not understanding that one cannot outrun pain and suffering. Suffering comes with life itself. Those who have given birth or who have watched a birth know this to be true. The labor pains get stronger and closer together as the hour of a baby's birth nears.

And so it is with our birth into eternal life.

I often think of this earth as a "womb". God's womb, where He is preparing his children for their REAL life...their life in eternity. Yet, we dash madly about, not understanding that we are completely encompassed in the love of God. We fight against our "birthing pains". Were we to embrace them with grace and courage we might be able to quiet down enough to see that death is simply a doorway and not to be feared. For those who have loved, and loved deeply, death is as simple as walking from one room to another. It's the ultimate act of abandonment to the Divine Will. We do no work at death...God does all the work at this time. Just as a baby is born with no help from himself, so it is with us at the time of death. We simply "let go" and release ourselves into the tender hands of our Father in heaven.

I have "practiced" death many times and do not fear it. The "type" of death may concern me a bit but not the actual passage into eternity. What is there to fear? That I'll stumble into the hands of Divine Mercy? Isn't that the safest place for a sinner? The Cross says that this is so. Jesus asks us to trust Him. I "practiced" death because I had to. When I would have the breathing crises before my healing from Myasthenia Gravis, tossing myself into the hands of the Lord became second nature to me. I pretty much lost my fear of death itself, though maybe not the manner of it (yet).

~ Some people think that God does not "speak" to them. I do not know whether to laugh or cry whenever I hear someone say this. The truth is...God never shuts up. It is we who close our ears, hearts, and minds. I am not joking...the Lord never shuts up. Often, it is simply that we are too distracted to hear Him. It's pretty hard to multi-task you know. We have gotten so good (or bad, rather) at juggling numerous tasks and "commitments" that we have forgotten the biggest commitment of all... putting God first. If we were to do this, all the other aspects of our lives would fall into place. And if we would learn to quiet down and pay attention we would all "hear" God. His ways of speaking are endless. In this day and age, most of us have "spiritual" ADHD. Think about it. Our poor brains and our hearts are pulled in so many directions at once that we cannot possibly focus enough to pay attention to God. Plus we are hyperactive. A simple analogy would be this:

You invite a close friend over for dinner. When your friend arrives, He finds the TV on, the music from the stereo blasting, the hostess yelling at the children and running around throwing things together at the last minute because she just got back from the mall, doors are slamming, the house phone and the cell phone are both ringing...He tries to speak but cannot be heard over the uproar in the house.

This house is kind of like our hearts today. We are caught up in so many things, most are unimportant, and we cannot hear the Lord. We blame Him and say that, "God doesn't speak these days."

No...it is we who do not listen.

The Scoop

2011-10-02T16:42:00.000-07:00

My puppy has giardia. He has the runs as he runs...I kid you not. And he never stops running.

Run, Caesar, run.
See Caesar run.
Stop, Caesar, stop.
Caesar won't stop.

- My puppy is leaking :(
- I can't catch him :(
- Pooper scoopers don't work on diarrhea :(
- The medication takes weeks to work fully :(

Sigh. Poor little tyke.

Father Gordon MacRae - Removing the Scales from Our Eyes

2011-09-25T21:22:00.000-07:00

Pedophilia. Such an ugly word. People everywhere are quick to close their ears, shut their eyes, and seal their lips at the mere mention of the word. At times I believe that some people (including me for a little while?) would rather see an innocent man in jail "just in case" rather than take the time and the trouble to look at the facts of a case such as Fr. Gordon MacRae's with clear and unbiased eyes. There is so much evidence pointing to this man's innocence and yet he still sits in jail after 17 years. I ask, for the sake of truth and justice, that those who visit here take the time to read this article by Ryan A MacDonald. It (along with his other articles) shows how easily lies can steal a man's freedom.

Where is the public outcry? Why aren't people demanding that this case be reviewed? Where is the outrage over the imprisonment of a man who may very well be innocent?

I just don't get it. Even when speaking of myself. If you've read my previous post (see here too) about Fr. MacRae you'll see what I mean. Are we so blinded by the ugliness of pedophilia that we would cast a good man to the wolves "just in case" rather than peel back the scales from our eyes and admit that "just maybe, just maybe...an innocent man may be falsely imprisoned?"

It crossed my mind that if Fr. MacRae had been accused of murder and that if there was as much proof pointing to his innocence as there is in his case...he would have been out of jail years ago. Actually, no, I take that back...he would never have been convicted. It is only because of the type of crime he was accused of that he was convicted. Had it been a murder trial it would have been tossed out of court in a heartbeat.

If I'm being completely honest:

For a short while there was a little part of me that just wanted to close my eyes and seal my lips and ignore the fact that an innocent man may be in jail for a crime he didn't commit. All because of one word...pedophilia. After reading about the case I just couldn't do it though. I hated that part of me that would even consider such a thing in the first place. What ugliness was there in me that I would even consider turning a blind eye to an innocent man's plight? What does that make me?

Sometimes it's hard to look at myself in the mirror. This was one of those times. I like to believe that people are basically good... but maybe the truth is that we are very often selfish and if something doesn't directly affect us we have a tendency to ignore it? After all, a man sitting in prison for 17 years doesn't directly affect me, does it? What? Am I my brother's keeper? So he lives and dies in a jail cell for a crime he didn't commit? What can I possibly do about it?

Except...it does matter. Letting a man rot in jail and not speaking up if I believe in his innocence says a lot about a person's integrity. None of it good. It shows a heart completely lacking in compassion. It shows a heart of stone.

Sometimes stone walls do a prison make.

Sabbath Moments - This and That

2011-09-24T05:38:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God". Here are some of my Sabbath Moments this week:

- I love going to Mass after seeing my daughter off to school. I have just enough time to do a Rosary (or most of one) before the 9:00 AM Mass. I used to go to Mass at noon but I much prefer the morning Mass. Receiving the Eucharist in the morning fills me with grace for the day.

- I started a Novena to St. Therese this week. I had been having trouble with insomnia and as soon as I started the Novena my sleep improved...and it wasn't even one of my prayer intentions. Thank you, Lord! Those who suffer from insomnia regularly know how frustrating it can be. I have to battle grumpiness all day when I get minimal sleep.

- The leaves are starting to change color around here! Hurray for Fall! My favorite season of all!

- My new puppy is adorable, sweet, and a bundle of energy! It takes all three of us to keep up with him. For the first time we have tried crate training and it's working out well. I leave the door to the crate open so that when he feels overwhelmed he has his own "special spot" to retreat to. He uses it too! I was never one for crate training but have since changed my mind. It's his "comfort zone". He actually sleeps through the night in it without a whimper. I thought we would be getting up a number of times per night because he is so tiny (two and a half pounds) but he doesn't wake up, much to our surprise. The minute he DOES get up he has to go outside though! Still, I didn't think such a young puppy would have that much bladder control.

- We had a family gathering at my parents' house last week. My parents have been married for 51 years! My entire family came, except for one niece who was ill. I love how close we all are to each other. The entire family gets together on a regular basis and I treasure each and every one of them.

Don't forget to vote...

2011-09-23T17:16:00.000-07:00

...over at the Crescat. One of my favorite bloggers, Kathryn from Heart for God has been nominated as "Best New Kid on the Block" and in my eyes she is certainly that! I hope those who love Kathryn's blog will pop over and vote for her!

These Stone Walls is also up for nomination in the "The Most Under Appreciated Blog" category. It has my vote!

Voting ends this Sunday.

Meet Caesar

2011-09-22T07:51:00.000-07:00

Caesar is the newest addition to our family! He is a purebred Papillon puppy and very good natured, playful, and totally irresistible. He likes to take his owners for a lot of walks and thinks the world is one giant playground...or one giant chew toy. His little teeth are attached to my jeans as we speak. He is kid-friendly, easy to train (we haven't worked on the chewing yet), and my nickname for him is "Tumbleweed" because he loves somersaulting around the room.

Please note:
I did NOT put that hideous necklace around his neck for the above photo. This picture came with his papers. Me, I would NEVER put such a thing on a dog. How crass. It looks quite silly, to boot. I quickly exchanged it for a green bandanna ;)

The newspapers are for "just in case" (though I'm not sure how well he can read) but he has already figured out that the great oudoors is not only a giant playground but also a great place to take care of "business". And if he IS caught off guard in the house, well, reading the paper will help get things running smoothly. After all...it works for my husband.

The Great King and "the pretender to the throne"

2011-09-20T11:43:00.000-07:00

Like most people, I have a duplicitous heart and have struggled to cede control over my "little world" to the one who is the Creator of the world. As a matter of fact, I am, unwittingly, often my own worse enemy. My "little world" is a false one and the queen of this "world" is a pretender to the throne:

She must be unseated but she fights to keep her position. God is gentle but firm in dethroning her. It is taking years but she has ceded much ground to Him. He often sends foot soldiers in to pierce her dreadful armor and at this point the armor is ragged and torn and helps little in the way of defense. During each skirmish she is quicker and quicker to wave the "white flag" and is beginning to gracefully concede her "powerlessness" in the eyes of the great King. One day He will surely "disarm" her completely. She is secretly looking forward to this day. You see, He has promised to share with this "pretender to the throne" his own kingdom and has given her many glimpses of the treasures within. But first... first she must cast her own crown of "fool's gold" to the ground along with the baubles she clutches in her hands if she wants to enter HIS kingdom. But what will happen to her own little kingdom? Will it just dissipate into thin air? After all the years she spent building it? Still, if she was being honest she would admit that the baubles and crown were growing heavier each year and bowing her head and back down under their great weight. What good is a kingdom with one subject anyway? Maybe she should take the chance and toss them down right now?

She once thought He was her enemy and was deeply afraid of Him. At one time, He spent day and night scaling the walls of her little kingdom. She grew utterly exhausted trying to keep Him out. As time wore on she got used to his intrusions into her small world and her heart would begin to quicken when she heard his footsteps. She didn't admit that to Him back then for fear He would crush her with his strength and collapse her little kingdom with one blow. He was never one to follow the rules though and she began to realize that He was actually quite fond of her and had no wish to destroy her, but, merely to dismantle her kingdom piece by piece. At first she cried when He looted her kingdom but she quickly came to realize that the loot He "stole" were things she had borrowed from Him when she was young (they were close friends back then, you know) but had misused and forgotten to return. She could hardly get angry at Him for taking what was rightfully his, could she? There were times she missed her "borrowed things" but mostly she felt happy that she had less to worry about. It gave her more time gaze at Him in secret. She thought He must know by now that deep inside she loved Him but felt unworthy to do so. Once during their more peaceful moments He had told her that "love makes things worthy" and that his love would make all things new. He had others who lived in his Kingdom and they assured her that what He said was true.

Slowly but surely she began to believe. Still, there was the small problem of her kingdom. Had all the others had to give up their kingdoms too? 'Yes,' they assured her, 'but you shall see that your kingdom is nothing compared to the Great King's.'

They sure looked happy. Peaceful too. Maybe it was time to throw all caution to the wind? Here He was again looking at her patiently with a smile in his eyes. She took off her "gold" crown and laid it at his feet. The baubles silently slipped from her hands and her "kingdom" dissipated in the wind.

She did not look back.

St. Therese Novena

2011-09-19T18:51:00.000-07:00

I will be joining John-Paul (and many others) at Pray More Novenas for a Novena to St. Therese. For those who are interested in joining us, this Novena begins on September 22nd. You can also find a link to this site in my sidebar under Novena Reminder. I hope you'll join in!

Into the Silence

2011-09-17T20:25:00.000-07:00

Into the Silence
~~~~~~~~~~~

One foot in time

One foot in eternity

O, be still my mind

Be still my soul

For in the deepest silence

of the human soul

lies the peace which

surpasses all understanding

and in the quiet chambers

of a peaceful heart

time stands still

and eternity begins

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts become troubled or afraid." John 14:27

Sabbath Moments

2011-09-17T06:35:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment. Here are some of my Sabbath Moments this week:

~ I'm enjoying the nice weather we've been having. My favorite season is Fall and we are getting a good taste of it this week. I especially like the crisp evenings. I like to sit on the deck and just breathe in the fresh air. It's invigorating!

~ I love my morning prayer and Mass routine during the school year. Meditating on the mysteries of the Rosary prepares me for Mass and helps me get into the "right frame of mind" on hectic mornings. I just wish I would remember to bring my Magnificat with me once in a while. I like to see the readings while I am listening to them...it helps them sink in.

~ I haven't been reading very much this week but I pulled the book Imitation of the Sacred Heart of Jesus off my bookshelf and have begun digging into it again. I love books that teach us how to be more like Jesus.

~ My daughter has been telling me I'm the "best mom in the world" before she goes to sleep at night :) I'm not, of course, but I still love to hear those words!

You need to see this

2011-09-16T15:03:00.000-07:00

My mother-in-law e-mailed us this picture of the fire that has raged through parts of Texas. It has destroyed 1600 hundred homes so far. The fire is 75% contained but Texas needs rain badly. Here is a link that speaks about this terrible drought. Please pray for rain.

Netiquette - Rules of Engagement for the Catholic Blogosphere

2011-09-15T16:55:00.000-07:00

"Do not attract attention to yourself in public. This is one of the fundamental rules of good breeding. Shun conspicuous manners, conspicuous clothes, a loud voice, staring at people, knocking into them, talking across anyone—in a word do not attract attention to yourself. Do not expose your private affairs, feelings or innermost thoughts in public. You are knocking down the walls of your house when you do."
Emily Post

Miss Nettie Kette on Post and Combox manners:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1. Please remove gloves before engaging in battle on the site of a fellow blogger. They (as well as your fellow blogger) may be tossed into the public arena but it is impolite to toss them in another's face. Untidy gloves may be cleansed after battle by using "Out Damn Spot Remover".

2. You may use a sharpened tongue at the debate table but forked tongues must be tucked neatly inside the proper receptacle (in this case...a cheek will do).

3. When dueling with the tongue, (s)words must remain sheathed at all times. One careless thrust may result in elimination from comboxes. Or, even worse the "cut direct" in the Catholic blogosphere.

4 Please note that a small(s)word is primarily a thrusting rather than a cutting weapon.
.
5. Expect rapier quick thrusts to be parried and please do handle such thrusts in a dignified manner befitting your noble stature.

6. While at the (debate) table with Catholic nobility, it is necessary to use the title Sir before using a man's given name. As in Sir Mark Miwerds. It is also proper to use the title Lady as in Lady Em Becile.

7. If you are serving up "foul" expect mixed nuts at your table.

8. It is impolite to speak with your mouth full (of cr--p)

9. Never, ever, recline at table with swine unless your pearls are insured by Lloyd's.

10. Say Grace before devouring your prey.

11. If Grace does not respond to your call, yell for Mercy. Good servants are hard to find these days.

12. Not a peep out of women in Comboxes please! It is just not done. (I was simply appalled to see not one but TWO "peeps!" in a Combox recently. Please, Ladies, you are not chickens.) Decorum, Ladies!

13. White wine goes well with "fishy" subject matter. Red goes well with "meatier" subjects. If neither cleanse the palate do not resort to whiskey. Brandy goes well with refined desserts such as Humble Pie and Fruitcake Deluxe.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Our Lady of Sorrows

2011-09-15T08:19:00.000-07:00

On this feast day of Our Lady of Sorrows I want to dedicate these three poems to Our Lady. Most of you have read The Hammer and many have read Forever and Two Hearts but I still wanted to put them up today in honor of our Heavenly Mother.

Two Hearts
~~~~~~~~~
The Woman raised eyes sorrowful

Bedimmed with grief and loss

Suffering, she spoke not a word

But leaned upon the cross

In agony, her tears flowed down

A soldier pierced His side

Thorns crowned her baby's head

Her Life , her Joy, her Pride

Upon this scene I entered

Espied entwined two Hearts

Naked he came from her womb

...and naked he departs

         Forever
         ~~~~~~~
The Babe beheld his mother's eyes
As tenderly she soothed his cries
Filled with love and motherly joy
Mary caressed her baby boy

Throughout his life these eyes of grace
Followed Him from place to place
Until one day they mournfully
Followed Him to Calvary

Pierced by sorrow, stung by grief
She crawled beneath the witness tree
The Lord gazed down, beheld his mother
As one last time they looked at each other

Her eyes spoke forever, a love so profound
They rained their sorrow upon the ground
And those beautiful eyes first seen at his birth
Were the last eyes He saw as He left the earth

The Hammer
~~~~~~~~~
A Babe was born one silent night
To bring to earth a shining light
O Wisdom! Truth! A young boy grew
To bring to all life anew

And yet throughout this Child's years
A hammer echoed in his ears

He cured the sick and healed the lame
Forgave our sins, took on our shame
Light pierced darkness, brave and true
Grace upon grace for me and for you

But still throughout our Savior's years
A hammer echoed in his ears

A judas kiss, a King betrayed
Upon the cross the Lamb was laid
The hammer fell again and again
For human hearts are full of sin

And a mother's eyes streamed with tears
As the hammer echoed in her ears

O Heart so sorrowful, I tell you true
...this hammer echoes in my ears too

What's Next? Gas Chambers?

2011-09-14T16:54:00.000-07:00

I received this e-mail the other day from a friend and it is the reason I wrote so harshly about abortion yesterday:

Dear friends,

Please take about 5 minutes of your day today & read through this short article: http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2011/09/3844

The gist of it is that the people who are on our payroll in the Dept of Health & Human Services want children with Down Syndrome to be targeted prenatally as a "preventable condition".

Down Syndrome happens at conception. The only way this condition can be 'prevented' is to abort the baby, which is what is happening now to the majority of these children in utero.

The difference here is that, following this tragic trajectory, soon it will be illegal for parents to opt to give birth their children with this condition.

This is where we come in. At the end of the attached article, there is a link to the HHS Public Comments page which is currently open. Please take a moment & fill out this 3 question form & make your voice heard. I know you agree that we need to speak up in unison to stop the culture of death whose primary pillar is that anyone--young or old--who is inconvenient to us must be made convenient one way or the other.

Carrying Our Crosses

2011-09-14T08:15:00.000-07:00

Walk the Walk

~~~~~~~~~~~

Some call this world a burden

Some call this world a curse

But I call it a blessed place

For trust me... there's far worse

I'll walk this earth any day

No matter what the cost

I'll pray each and every day

That not one soul be lost

I'll walk the path of Jesus

With help, I'll walk it well

For His way leads to heaven

The wide road leads to hell

So if you see me walking

With grace, I will not tarry

For Jesus is my light and guard

My cross He helps me carry

And if I see you on this path

Which every day grows steeper

I'll help you if you fall, my friend

....I am my brother's keeper

Let Pleasing Him be my Theme...

2011-09-13T11:41:00.000-07:00

"You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."

I have been blogging for over two years now. Blogging has its ups and downs but overall I enjoy it. What has caused me some concern, however, is that in some ways I have lost the purity of my strong but simple faith. My goal for blogging was simply this: to share the truth and love that God has poured into my heart and to please God, not people. You see, I spent a good portion of my life as a "people pleaser" instead of standing up for truth alone. I was wishy-washy and, no doubt, what Jesus considers lukewarm. I feared what others thought of me...and, on occasion, still find myself falling into this "wanting to please the crowd mentality". God has spent years working to heal this fault of mine. Time after time, He has nudged me to read the scripture verse, "So Pilate, wanting to please the crowd, released to them Barabbas..."

"People pleasing" is wrong, this has become clear to me over the years. We live in a society that is so dysfunctional that the habit of pleasing others instead of standing up for truth is deeply ingrained in us. Being "politically correct" is a term often used to describe "people pleasing". Political correctness is a subtle form of spiritual tyranny. How can you connect "political correctness" with tyranny you might ask? Easily.

Under the guise of "political correctness" we have allowed truth to be trampled underfoot to such a degree that we have lost sight of the clear path that Jesus set forth for us when He came to earth 2000 years ago. The love he spoke about has no resemblance to our current "popular" definition of love. You are considered a "loving" and "peaceable" person these days as long as you never rock the boat. We are spoon fed this false "love" in a manner that makes it palatable. No longer are we called to simply and in truth love the sinner (which we all are), but rather, we are asked in the name of the false "love" of the world to embrace the actual "sin". Those who do not comply with this are called bigots and worse. Yet they do not see that forcing us to embrace sin is the worst and deadliest kind of bigotry.

They call lust - "Free Love"

They call birth control -"protection"

They call a baby - "a blob of cells"

They call abortion - "pro-choice"

They call euthanasia - "mercy killing"

The court of "public opinion" has slammed the hammer down and has claimed lies as truth. Let's quickly unmask a few of the above examples and we will quickly see that the truth and love are not served by these "politically correct" terms in any way, shape, or form.

Lust is a sin because it objectifies the human person. It is immoral because we are not "merely animals" and were created in the image and likeness of God. It is considered one of the 7 Deadly Sins. "Free love" is a misnomer because there is nothing free about lust. It is a form of bondage. I put the examples above into this particular order to show how one type of sin opens the door to others.) The connection is easy to see so I don't think there is really a need to explain it.)

Birth control - have you ever seen the ads that ask the question, "Are you protected?" I always want to answer: Why would I need protection against babies? They seem pretty harmless to me. (If it's a question of disease, my comment on lust covers that one.)

Calling a baby a "blob of cells" is simply a way of justifying abortion. Our consciences will not allow us to "kill a baby" so we must once again objectify the human person by calling it less than it is. And once again we are brought back to lust. This is why the 7 Capital sins are called "doorways" to other sins.

Abortion is called "pro-choice". This is an attempt to cover the harsh reality of murder by taking someone's focus away from the truth that abortion is killing a baby and drawing a person's attention to
the cause of freedom instead. "How dare you tell me what I can and cannot do?! I am a free person with rights you know! You people sicken me! You bunch of zealots!"

Little do they realize that we are trying to protect both them and their unborn children.

I am called judgmental because I am trying to keep them from harm.

Sin is of such a dreadful mien
That to be hated is but to be seen
But oft seen becomes a familiar face
At first tolerated and then embraced

Alexander Pope

I am called a bigot because though I easily embrace people regardless of their beliefs I will not embrace the actual beliefs themselves.

I am called a zealot because I believe that there is an absolute Truth and, for me, this Truth is a Person.

This Person has a name... Jesus

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the way, do you know what Hitler's term for genocide was?

Ethnic cleansing.

A Tangled Web

2011-09-12T17:58:00.000-07:00

"You will certainly not die! No, God knows well that the moment you eat of it your eyes will be opened and you will be like gods who know what is good and what is evil." Gen. 3:5

The New Age Movement is a spiritual path fraught with dangers of every kind. Unsuspecting souls are easily led astray through the subtle mixture of truth and lies New Age spirituality contains. Like the fruit in the story of the Garden of Eden, pleasing to the eye, if one bites into it deeply enough the worm which never dies is exposed. The New Age Movement is simply Satan's clever way of replaying the fall of man over and over again. After all, it worked before, right? Serve something up under the guise of good and there's bound to be takers. Whether you believe the story of the Garden of Eden is truth or allegory is not the point. The point is that man was seduced into disobeying God and this disobedience continues to ripple through the generations. No longer was God the center of our existence, man himself became the center. Interestingly enough, pride was our downfall just as it was for Satan and all the angels he took with him while attempting to usurp the throne of God. No doubt Satan considered this one of his finest moments and shook with glee at our stupidity. He's not one who likes to suffer alone. There's some truth in the saying that "misery likes company". Unlike us, Lucifer understood the full ramifications of what his disobedience would confer upon him and didn't care in the least.

God did not forsake man, He redeemed us instead, but we still suffer the consequences of original sin.
Our goal here is not to make peace with a fallen world nor is it to toss into the public false ideologies which reduce this need for redemption or throw it away altogether. I'm not okay and you are not okay. I may care about someone and accept them but this doesn't mean that we are okay. Humanity with its fallen nature is very fragile and prone to sin. Our proclivity to sin is a fact that is easily established by taking a quick glance at the world around us.

One of the problems with New Age thought is that it is often an attempt at self-redemption and this can never work. How can someone whose own nature is broken fix himself? Or anyone else for that matter. He cannot. It's not possible. During my own life, I have known a number of Christians who have allowed themselves to be swayed by New Age philosophies. Most of them have returned to their Christian roots but not without difficulty. The New Age focus on "self" and power is a huge draw. Sometimes it's hard to dethrone this false god, it takes humility and the acceptance of our own powerlessness both over ourselves and others. Which brings me to another aspect of the New Age that is troublesome - pantheism (from the greek pan = everything and theos = God): all is God.

Everything is not God and neither is every person. That God deigns to reside in us doesn't make us God. Pantheism is easily proven false...not a one of us has the power to create the universe. Those who subscribe to this philosophy have too high an opinion of themselves. I, for one, am thankful that I am not God. I am thankful that you are not, also. Creation is not equal to the creator.

This is a blessing. New Age spirituality is a form of "spiritual narcissism" and the deeper a person becomes enmeshed in its web the harder is to disentangle oneself. Grace alone accomplishes this.

Here is the personal account of a man who was involved in New Age spirituality. His story gives a quick overview of how New Age occult practices can endanger the soul. Another site which tackles the subject of New Age Spirituality is Catholic Apologetics Guidebook. At this site you can find links, debates and articles related to the New Age Movement.

Many years ago a friend of our family was caught up in New Age spirituality for a few years. She practiced a form of New Age mysticism and used to leave her body regularly. She called it "going under". One day, as she was returning to her body, much to her horror a demon was trying to enter it. She called out to Jesus for help, the demon disappeared, and she reentered her body. After this episode she cut off all ties with New Age and occult activity, did a thorough house cleaning, went to Confession, and is now wary of anything that even touches upon the New Age. It frightened her so badly that she even warns people about Yoga and the meditation practices that go along with it.

Elena at Fountain of Elias has put up a post which speaks about this type of "Pseudo-mysticism" and it is a must read for everyone who is interested in mysticism. I highly recommend reading the article in its entirety.

September 11, 2001: An Account of that Day You Haven’t Heard

2011-09-10T20:39:00.000-07:00

A view of 9/11 as seen through the eyes of Father Gordon MacRae, the author of These Stone Walls. Well worth reading for its unique perspective and the ramifications this day held and still holds for all Americans, even those imprisoned. An eye-opener.

How to Trim Your Followers List in Three Simple Steps

2011-09-10T11:42:00.000-07:00

For those of you who, like me, get confused over the Follower's gadget in the sidebar and need to trim it down to a manageable level I have three quick and easy steps to help you do so:

1. Be sure to mention the fact that you, along with the Pope, believe that both the Novus Ordo Mass and the Traditional Latin Mass are valid.

2. Don't forget to mention Medjugorje at least once a month if you are trying to trim it down rather quickly. This is the speediest way for those of you who have time constraints and cannot refer to various other apparitions because Google cannot find them easily enough.

3. If you would prefer a slow but thorough cleaning it would be a good idea to bring up the fact that you receive Communion in the hand when you have a cold to spare your elderly priest, whose hands waver, from getting ill and who must ask his parishioners to hold their heads as still as possible when receiving.

If none of the above work, do not despair. Simply mention the word, "Charismatic" and you will be guaranteed to clear out an average of five a week. Also, it's good to note that as Followers plummet site stats skyrocket though I'm not quite sure what the connection is.

Coming soon by request: Netiquette

Sabbath Moments - No Sweeter Sound

2011-09-10T07:13:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

I am back to my Fall/Winter/Spring Mass schedule and rejoicing in the fact that I have the opportunity to attend daily Mass again. During the week I attend Mass in the next town over and this parish has a new Pastor. During every Mass, I cannot help but notice his extreme reverence during the consecration. In all my years I have only seen one other priest intonate the Eucharistic Prayer in such a reverential manner. If it wasn't for the fact that we are all kneeling and have pews in front of us I'm wondering if we would not all end up prostrate on the ground.

Many homeschooling mothers bring their children to this Mass. We recite the Angelus for vocations before Mass begins and one little tot behind me not only prayed the Angelus but the entire Mass with great fervor. She was still in diapers. Another little girl beside me prayed the Mass so beautifully that I
complimented her afterward.

Who says children don't belong at Mass? Likely, the prayers of these little children obtain far more graces for the world than any of us could ever imagine. I couldn't help but think that the toddler behind
was well on her way to sainthood and that most adults could take lessons in piety from her.

Have you ever heard one of these little ones chant the Sanctus? Latin from the mouth of babes...is there a sweeter sound than this? I tried to embed a video of a preschooler chanting the Gloria but it wouldn't allow me to. You can find it here, though. And how about this 3-year-old's rendition of the Pater Noster?

Crank it up, Shadowlands!

2011-09-09T12:48:00.000-07:00

This takes my breath away...

2011-09-08T19:41:00.000-07:00

Maybe many of you have already found this gem but for those who haven't visited I Want to See God yet, please check out - A King's Ransom. Blogging doesn't get much better than this, folks.

After much pondering...

2011-09-08T08:10:00.000-07:00

After much pondering, I have concluded it was a heretic. All saints are here and accounted for. Thank you, Jesus...

Update on One Down

2011-09-07T17:30:00.000-07:00

Hey! I still have Mother Teresa and Blessed John Paul II though! What a relief! I would NOT want to
offend those two!

One Down

2011-09-07T17:25:00.000-07:00

One down, only 118 to go. I wonder who I offended this time?

Hopefully it wasn't the Pope.

What? You didn't know he follows my blog?

Why else would his picture be on my followers list?

Broken

2011-09-06T10:52:00.000-07:00

"Maisy! Show Uncle Randy and Aunty Mary how you sing your ABC's!"

Ronny's face beamed as his 2-year-old proudly recited the alphabet he had spent days teaching her. I watched him grab her and smother her little face with kisses, praising her for a job well done.

"Isn't she amazing!! She's only two!"

Laughing, I agreed, "Yep! You have a smart one on your hands! Good job, Maisy!"

This is my last good memory of Ronny and I cling tightly to it. If I let go of it... all I can see is his precious body tossed in the street like so much rubbish. And it hurts. Dear God, it hurts. I sit here with tears streaming down my face at man's inhumanity to his fellow man. This is not a fancy post. I am raw with grief and am not capable of posting anything sensible right now. These are simply my thoughts...tangled and unsorted.

"Why, Lord? Why couldn't you help him? He has 2 children, a brother, sister, father...why, Lord?! Jesus, it hurts so much."

No quiet gentle voice replies. Just silence.

"I gave him to you, Lord! I placed this man in your hands and saw you cradle him. He was one of my 'special ones', one of my 'broken ones'. I trusted you. How many times do I have to watch them lose their battles?"

More silence. I have no right to ask such questions. I know this but my heart refuses to be still.

"Are people only allowed a certain number of miracles, Lord? Is that it? Cause if it is, I'm way over quota."

Yes, I'm fresh sometimes. After all the Lord has given me I still strike out. I am "broken" too, you see. Not in the same manner...but "broken", nonetheless. How dare I presume to speak so to the Lord? It's a question I often ask myself.

"But I prayed and I prayed and I prayed! I would have gladly given up a few of my "miracles" for him!"

What an ungrateful wretch I am. I do not understand the Heart of God aside from the occasional glimpses he shares with me. The Lord stepped in time and time again for Ronny. A few years ago I wrote this about Ronny here on my blog:

"Our Lord's mercy is infinite and I am always left awestruck by this mercy. There is a man who lives in our city; I don't want to give his name so I will just call him R. My husband and I both know him. He is deeply depressed, a drug addict and suicidal. He went from being addicted to prescription drugs to heroin. The Lord has called me to deep intercessory prayer for R. This type of prayer is so powerful that it leaves me in tears. I placed R. in the hands of Jesus and Jesus cradled this broken man in His arms. I cried and cried.

R. has had six suicide attempts and all have failed. He has overdosed on pills twice and lived. He held a gun to his head, pulled the trigger and the gun misfired. He sliced his wrists and lived. He hung himself and this failed too! A couple months ago he jumped off a three story building and only got a broken rib. These are serious suicide attempts and all have failed. God hears our prayers and answers them, sometimes miraculously.

R. is homeless now but he is still alive. I ask those who read this to please pray for him."

I read this now and my heart is stilled a bit. I wonder how many people hang themselves and survive? How many guns fail to fire? How many people jump from third story buildings and only get a broken rib?

Ronny never did succeed in his "quick" suicide attempts. Heroin got him instead. After he died from an accidental overdose in a drug dealer's house they simply threw his dead body in the street like a piece of rubbish. They did not understand that this was a soul cherished by God.

As I write this, a picture of Jesus comes to my mind. I see him "catching" Ronny in his arms after jumping from the building. I see a hand gently removing a bullet from the chamber of a gun.

I see Jesus on a dirty street corner picking up a broken man and cradling him once again.

Yes, God is silent. But sometimes...a picture is worth a thousand words.

Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord.

Mass Destruction

2011-09-05T13:56:00.000-07:00

We have at our disposal the means to spread the Gospel worldwide. With a touch of a keyboard
at that. Within seconds our words are accessible to millions across the globe. Perhaps millions
don't read them but the words are there, nonetheless. Often, instead of being used as a tool to
reach out to others in a meaningful Christian manner, the internet is used as a weapon of mass destruction, its effects more far reaching than an atomic bomb because the effect can be spiritual and eternal. I don't speak here of only the websites which are obvious in their sinfulness but also those sites which in a subtle and insidious manner attack the simple faith of Catholics around the world. Reinforced by intellectualism and an air of religious superiority masked as "theological knowledge" some sites go so far as to even question the validity of the Novus Ordo Mass. And some do it in under the guise of "helping" God. No doubt, some are even doing this with the best of intentions.

As if God is not capable of helping himself if he so chooses. Yes, he often chooses to work through
people but this is despite us not because of us. Our part is to cooperate with His grace. We are simply human vessels, with fallen natures to boot. Not a one of us truly knows the heart of God and his thoughts are not our thoughts. That he deigns to use us as vehicles to build the Kingdom of God is almost laughable, wouldn't you say? That He has given us the Holy Spirit as our Helper is in itself enough to drop us to our knees. The Eucharist? This is a gift so profound that even the greatest saints had difficulty finding words to express this Treasure given to the Church.

Truly, our blogs and websites are insignificant when you think of the power of God. I can only surmise that the love of God walks hand in hand with His divine sense of humor. It's good to keep things in perspective in regard to what we write. Yes, He CAN and DOES work through fragile human beings but we can easily become sidetracked by forgetting that the Holy Spirit does the inspiring and "off we go!" claiming his gift as something innate to ourselves. Even worse, we often mix our own human reasoning with the inspiration of the Spirit and make a fine mess of things.

Back to the Mass. With over 1 billion Catholics in the world, Mass is being celebrated around the clock. CEO's sit in pews beside blue collar workers. Senators rub shoulders with homeless people...you get my drift. We are one, holy, catholic and apostolic Church.

Some claim that that Novus Ordo Masses are invalid. One site I stumbled upon called the Holy Eucharist "circus bread". If you want to find the site, Google it. Don't ask me where it is... I got off
that site in a hurry. It is there, trust me. The Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Christ present in the Eucharist referred to as "circus bread". How many other Catholics come across sites like these? What
harm is caused by thoughtless and untruthful words like these? These sites are stumbling blocks to many
people.

Mass destruction instead of Mass instruction.

What's wrong with this picture? St. Thomas Aquinas would have jumped for joy if he had the opportunities to spread the glories of the Mass that we have at our fingertips.

The Mass. The glorious, ineffable mystery of the Catholic Mass. In an effort to mitigate some of the damage caused by divisions among Catholics concerning the Mass, the liturgy, and the validity of the Blessed Sacrament I share with you these beautiful quotes by souls far holier and far wiser than ourselves:

"Reverence, therefore, reverence this table, of which we are all communicants! Christ, slain for us, the sacrificial victim who is placed thereon!" St. John Chysostom   (Catholic Answers)

"It would be easier for the world to survive without the sun than to do without the Holy Mass." St.
Padre Pio

"It is the whole Community, the Body of Christ united with its Head, that celebrates. Liturgical services are not private functions but are celebrations of the Church which is the sacrament of unity, namely, the holy people united and organized under the authority of the bishops. Therefore, liturgical services pertain to the whole Body of the Church."    CCC 1140

"How I hate this folly of not believing in the Eucharist, etc..! If the Gospel be true, if Jesus Christ be God, what difficulty is there?"     Blaise Pascal

The fact and the main point of this post is (feel free to confirm this with the Pope):

Both the New Mass AND the Traditional Latin Mass are valid. One's personal preference does not change this fact. We are free to attend either one. Both are beautiful, not because the participants are perfect.... but because Christ is present.

May we humbly thank Him.

Sabbath Moments - Hurray!

2011-09-03T05:47:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

School is now in session.

Yippee! Woohoo! Hurray! Grand central station is now closed until the afternoon!

Excited? Who, me?

Why would the thought of 5 or 6 kids (not including my own) raiding my refrigerator, slamming doors, letting loose hamsters, chasing the dog and trashing my small condo excite me?

Gee, I'm not sure. Maybe the thought of holding on to the few brain cells I have left has something to do with it.

Probably a few moms will not think this is an appropriate Sabbath Moment.

I send these moms an open invitation to visit my small condo during the summer. But, don't forget to -

BYOE...

Bring your own earplugs.

Beer is a plus too.

Prayer is powerful

2011-09-01T19:41:00.000-07:00

Esther at A Catholic Mom in Hawaii has received a very interesting e-mail from Fr. Gordon MacRae. Check this post out!

I "Bot" some Trouble

2011-09-01T10:45:00.000-07:00

I knew I shouldn't have made fun of Googlebot by referring to it as Googlebutt in the combox of my recent post Would You Care for a Slice of Humble Pie? It seems Googlebot has some close relatives who took offense at my remark and one particular bot cousin decided to insert a little extra code into one of my widgets. What happens when one of these little trolls inserts extra code into one of your gadgets is this:
No one can get onto your site. It sends them somewhere else. It's not a virus - these bots can do this on third party widgets. I wanted to warn others in case this happens to them. Puff at Puff's Blog about Stuff has a post up that points out how busy these little bots can be. The concern isn't so much with Googlebot but with other bots trolling the blogosphere. Like the hungry blog monster who steals your comments and posts before you can publish them, these little fellows can cause a whole heap of trouble.

Did you know the word widget is also used to describe a certain type of gremlin? Yep, found that piece of information on Wikipedia. Just a tidbit to clutter the "useless trivia that will never come in handy" section of your brain. Kind of like square roots which I've never had the opportunity to use in real life. Gremlin...hmmm. Well, if the shoe fits....

Thank you, Victor, for your brilliant insight on ridding oneself of widgets. I must admit, "fig juice" and "castor oil" never crossed my mind :-)

Commenting on Comments

2011-08-30T18:55:00.000-07:00

I don't usually post about comments received in my combox but I thought this one (in regard to my post on Fr. Gordon MacRae) should be read by as many people as possible. Ryan A MacDonald is the author of two of the articles I linked to in my previous post and is also the author of the blog A Ram In the Thicket (which I highly recommend). In response to my post he remarked (I omitted a small portion but here is the part that caught my eye):
"As the author of two of the links mentioned in this post, I would like to comment further.... But it's even worse than the writer knows. The mother of this priest's accusers had a career as a child sex abuse investigator for New Hampshire's Child Protective Services. She had worked for years with the detective who choreographed this case. She had also testified many times as a State's witness in child sex abuse cases that came before Father MacRae's judge. By the time she appeared as the aggrieved mother of three men who stood to gain in excess of $650,000 in this case, she was already well-known to the judge. From day one in this trial the judge referred to the priest as "the defendant" and the accuser as "the victim." But there is a lot more. The accusers' mother and the police detective both had awareness of other cases involving other accused priests that had never gone to trial and had been quietly settled. So they lifted elements of those other cases and injected them into the case against Father Gordon MacRae. This had the Kafkaesque effect of causing Father MacRae's Diocese to distance itself from him from day one. Before trial, the Diocese tried to control this information by declaring MacRae guilty before he ever set foot in a courtroom. The levels of betrayal go on and on, but what was betrayed more than anything is the "justice" that we all presume takes place in a modern American court of law."

This fits in with a portion of the police report I read that I couldn't quite follow as many of the names were blocked out and the report became quite confusing at times because of this. The officer referred a few times to a woman he worked with but I simply assumed that this was a fellow officer or someone employed by the police department. I didn't realize that this was an investigator for N.H. Child Protective Services. This "missing" piece of information casts even more dark shadows on a case that is drawing the attention of people around globe. It also sheds light on areas of the case that reminded me of "copy cat" crimes (false accusations are certainly crimes) in that other priests were accused of the same exact crime, in the same exact place and even the details of the abuse were exactly the same. What are the odds of this happening? The same exact scenario? The odds are slim at best.

I'd also like to recommend the post Called as Heralds of Truth written by Karinann at Daughter of the King. In this post she speaks about the clergy abuse scandal, Fr. MacRae, and the organization SNAP. In her comment section she remarks, "In the name of helping victims, organizations like SNAP have begun abuse of another kind." I couldn't help but be struck by the truth in this statement. What began as a group reaching out their hands to survivors of sexual abuse by priests has evolved into something else altogether. This is what happens when the cause itself becomes more important than truth. It's not hard to understand how this may come about when it concerns an issue as sensitive as child abuse but when a group gets carried away by their cause it no longer serves justice but, as Karinann says, it becomes abuse of another kind.

Father Gordon MacRae - Balancing the Scales of Justice

2011-08-28T19:10:00.000-07:00

Last week I published my first post regarding the bizarre case of Gordon MacRae and in this second post I continue to express my concern over the very high possibility that an innocent man is spending his life in prison for a crime he did not commit.

"You can't possibly know for certain that he is innocent."

No, I can't. No one can give 100% guarantee of a man's innocence or guilt when there is absolutely no physical evidence in a case. None. No DNA, no videos, no tangible evidence of any kind. I don't consider snapshots (taken by the pd) of the inside of a rectory physical evidence. This simply tells me that a rectory exists. Many of us can describe the inside of a rectory, myself included...all three floors of one in fact. Does this mean I've been abused there? Of course not. It simply says that I've been in one. So has my little girl for that matter. What the lack of evidence DOES tell me is that the odds of a man possibly being innocent of the charges against him begin to rise at this point. Doesn't mean he is innocent but there's already something pointing to this possibility.

"Okay, but the police did a thorough investigation you know."

Yes, indeed they (excuse me, he) did. In fact, I've never seen anything quite like it. Zealous, fanatical, AND thoroughly misleading. It seemed as if the police officer in charge made sure that every teenager who had ever met Fr. MacRae at some point was asked their opinion on his sexual orientation. He also asked a number of teenagers over and over again in various ways if they were SURE that they didn't have any sexual incidents to report and even after being assured was unconvinced by these assurances and suggested they think about it for a time.

God forbid a priest hug a troubled teen. Trust me, they don't these days. They are afraid to even touch their arms on accident. Don't believe me? Ask a priest.

So, yes, I'd have to agree that it was thorough. At one point the officer even tried to connect Fr. MacRae to a crime that took place in Florida and despite clear evidence that this never happened (which I found in an AG document) this wasn't pointed out in the police report....at least not in the one that I found.

You can damn a man by the evidence you leave out you know. At least in the eyes of the public. Which then brings us to another point: trial by media. Let's face it, many a man or woman has been found guilty in the "court of public opinion" based on biased and misleading journalism. All the sordid details of an accusation are quick to come out but you never get to hear any kind of a rebuttal from the accused party. It just doesn't work this way. Therefore, the public only gets to hear one side of the story and in the case of Fr. MacRae this is exactly what happened in newspapers all over the state. I should know, I've read them. Living here in N.H. this information is easy for me to find as I know the names of most of the "major" N.H. and Massachusetts papers. People in both states were still reeling over 2 previous cases of sexual abuse by members of the clergy in Massachusetts so you can imagine the climate here when Fr. MacRae's case became known. A fair and impartial jury is not easy to find under these circumstances. I have heard people claim that because Fr. MacRae's trial was one of the first in N.H. that bias was not the issue in his case but let me assure you that this is not true. Most of the news in N.H. comes from the much larger Massachusetts TV stations and newspapers.

"Surely the judge wouldn't have sentenced him to spend thirty-three and a half to sixty-seven years in prison if the man wasn't guilty! No one would do that."

The judge sentenced him to such a lengthy term because Fr. MacRae showed no remorse. Well, to be honest, I wouldn't have shown any remorse either. Why would someone show remorse for a crime they didn't commit?

"The state must have been convinced that the evidence was very strong or they wouldn't have proceeded with it."

Actually, no... obviously they were not convinced because they offered a plea bargain of one to three years if Fr. MacRae would plead guilty. If you truly believe someone is preying on children and that your case is solid you would go all out. But no, this is not the case, Fr. MacRae was offered plea deals a number of times. Which begs the question:

If you were guilty of a crime wouldn't you accept a plea deal?

If you were not guilty wouldn't you refuse it?

I hope that each of you will take the time to read the links below:
- Truth in Justice (A note here - I have seen Fr. Scruton a few times many years ago. He is a real person and the parishes mentioned in this story are real. The only one I haven't been to is the one in Keene.)
- Should the Case against Father Gordon MacRae be Reviewed? ( A must read - one of the accusers recants his story and sheds new light on the case.)

My hope is that by reading this post (and others) people will dig a bit deeper into the case of Fr. MacRae. I'm writing it because there is a prison thirty minutes away that likely holds an innocent man within its cells and my conscience will not allow me to ignore this any longer.

"What about those of us who already believe this man is innocent?"

That's easy to answer. Make a stink. A big one. The more people who read the other side of the story the better. Write letters, write articles, blog about it. Keeping quiet is not an option if you believe someone may be falsely imprisoned. Every Christian knows the high cost of silence.

And most of all....pray.

Now THIS is what I call a Meme!

2011-08-27T16:47:00.000-07:00

Please join Victor at Time for Reflections for my favorite meme of all times. All are welcome to join in!

Sabbath Moments - Laughter

2011-08-27T06:02:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

I love a good laugh. Laughter really IS good medicine and I often get a good dose of this natural remedy at sites run by certain bloggers. (See my post from yesterday.) I once read that humor can actually be a defense mechanism and while this is likely true in certain cases in other cases it's just plain old good fun. It helps us to not take life quite so seriously and at the same time also helps us not take ourselves quite so seriously either. In any case, it's definitely a good thing to have alongside a fallen nature! What would we do without this gift? Laughter is a precious gift from God! We may be born crying but this doesn't last long.

Laughter is catchy, too. I've loved this video from the very first time I saw it :)

Would You Care for a Slice of Humble Pie?

2011-08-26T10:49:00.000-07:00

My computer illiteracy isn't limited to just using a computer...it extends to pretty much everything concerning computers in general. My brother is a computer programmer and I have to admit that when he tries to explain how certain programs work my brain processes it as Martian and quickly shuts down to avoid
further attempts at alien intrusion.

On occasion, I have noticed that my site stats jump suddenly and inexplicably. Being a somewhat logical person my reactions following these sudden jumps were always, "Wow! Who would have thunk it?! Someone is actually reading ALL my posts." Two plus two equals four, right? "Hmmm....maybe my posts are more interesting than I thought."

Until I read THIS.

Not wanting to be a hog and eat all the pie alone I am kindly sharing it with my fellow bloggers. Enjoy ;)

Some people are just too honest, wouldn't you say?

A spoonful of sugar just doesn't do it for me.

2011-08-24T20:55:00.000-07:00

You know that old saying, "A spoon full of sugar makes the medicine go down." We've all heard it, right? Well, this all depends on what kind of medicine is being fed to you. When it comes to blogging the medicine can make you wretch at times, sugarcoated or not. When will I ever learn? I like to visit some sites to keep up with Church news and I expect to get exactly that....news on issues in my Church. I even like reading opinions provided they are worded with a certain degree of charity. I don't expect people to see eye to eye on everything and I find it helpful to read the viewpoints of my fellow Catholics. A certain amount of debate is good too...keeps us on our toes.

It seems that my expectations are too high I guess. A lack of charity in the comment sections is one thing but it's another thing altogether when I read a post and see that a good man's name is subtly blackened without thought to the repercussions that may follow in regard to the people who read the posts and for the man himself. That some authors begin their posts with honeyed speech doesn't lessen the damage done later in the post. If you are going to attack someone then please just be upfront about it and admit to your readers what you are about to do. It's deceitful to begin a post with all sorts of kind words about a person and then begin to shred him halfway through. I don't call that criticism ...I call it poison. If you dig up dirt on someone and are about to share said dirt then, please, by all means, do us a favor and just get it over with right from the beginning so that we don't have to read half the post to see where you are going with it. Especially if it's a long post.

Yes, I'm frustrated. It's my own fault of course. My computer has an off button and I guess it's time to use it.

Sigh. Maybe it's time for me to give up blogging.

Thomas Merton - The Evening of the Visitation

2011-08-23T17:32:00.000-07:00

I love Thomas Merton's poetry. My favorite poem by him is To the Immaculate Virgin, On a Winter Night but this one which I just found on Poetry, Prayer, and Praise is another gem. Enjoy!

The Evening of the Visitation
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Go, roads, to the four quarters of our quiet distance,

While you, full moon, wise queen,

Begin your evening journey to the hills of heaven,

And travel no less stately in the summer sky

Than Mary, going to the house of Zachary.

The woods are silent with the sleep of doves,

The valleys with the sleep of streams,

And all our barns are happy with peace of cattle gone to rest.

Still wakeful, in the fields, the shocks of wheat

Preach and say prayers:

You sheaves, make all your evensongs as sweet as ours,

Whose summer world, all ready for the granary and barn,

Seems to have seen, this day,

Into the secret of the Lord's Nativity.

Now at the fall of night, you shocks,

Still bend your heads like kind and humble kings

The way you did this golden morning when you saw God's

Mother passing,

While all our windows fill and sweeten

With the mild vespers of the hay and barley.

You moon and rising stars, pour on our barns and houses

Your gentle benedictions.

Remind us how our Mother, with far subtler and more holy

influence,

Blesses our rooves and eaves,

Our shutters, lattices and sills,

Our doors, and floors, and stairs, and rooms, and bedrooms,

Smiling by night upon her sleeping children:

O gentle Mary! Our lovely Mother in heaven.

Father Gordon MacRae - Scaling the Walls of Injustice

2011-08-20T18:40:00.000-07:00

Seems strange to write a post about a priest imprisoned for sexual abuse of a minor a few days after posting about Diane and my horror of crimes of this nature but after pondering it for a while I came to the conclusion that the timing is actually perfect. Truth trumps emotions every time. Regarding the bizzarre case of Father MacRae, I had to throw out my leanings toward those suffering from the effects of abuse and try to look at his case through the eyes of truth... wherever this might lead. And it led me to some strange places indeed.

You cannot live in N.H. and not be aware of the sexual abuse scandal in the Church. This state was hit hard by it. When I first heard about Father MacRae many years ago I automatically assumed that this man was guilty of the charges against him. After all, he was tried by a jury of his own peers, wasn't he? Surely no one would convict an innocent man, would they? I really didn't give his particular case much more thought after this, other than to be relieved that a pedophile was off of our streets and in prison where he belonged.

Until last year. I started coming across articles about Father MacRae proclaiming his innocence of the charges levied against him. I ignored them for the most part but a niggling little doubt about his guilt planted its seed in my brain and I couldn't quite shake it for some reason. I visited his blog These Stone Walls a few times but that was the extent of my interest at the time. Many guilty people claim innocence. As a matter of fact, it seemed to me that when it came to being accused of a crime, unless they were caught red-handed, MOST people claim innocence. So I kept pushing the "little niggling doubt" to the back of my mind.

It kept returning. I started praying for him and I started thinking more and more about this priest imprisoned 30 minutes away from my home and decided to do some research about his case. I didn't want to start by going through his blog because I didn't want to be biased one way or the other. I tried to clear my mind of any preconceived notions of his guilt so that I could look at the facts of his case honestly, as if this was information I was reading for the first time. I read a number of newspaper articles and posts by other bloggers but, as convincing as some of these sounded, they still didn't tell me enough about his case. Life works in a funny way though. One day I decided to read his police files and, oddly enough, these very files that damned him so much in the eyes of others had the opposite effect on me...I started to become convinced of his innocence. There was something wrong with the report and right from the start I picked up on it. It became apparent before I was even midway through the report that the officer in charge had no interest in the truth. In his mind he had already condemned this man and was zealously searching for any little bit of dirt he could find on Fr. MacRae regardless of whether that "dirt" had substance or not. It almost seemed as if this officer was pushing the boys interviewed into making comments on the "queerness" of Father MacRae and often putting two and two together and coming up with five. (I'll write a bit more about this in a future post.) I found his manner of investigating very disturbing to say the least. There was little to no regard to the possibility that this man could be innocent. This really bugged me because truth is important to me and a man's honor, good name, and freedom were at stake here. Impartiality is a must when it comes to something so serious. I regretted my own assumption of his guilt when I first heard about him... though in my case I assumed the police department, the state, his defense, and the jury had all done their jobs with the integrity necessary when a man's freedom is at stake. My mistake. The more I read about Fr. MacRae's case the more I see what a travesty of justice the investigation and the trial were. That the Church basically "washed their hands clean" of him distressed me even more. "What is truth?" It began to remind me of Pontius Pilate washing his hands of the matter of Jesus' guilt or innocence and "handing Him over to the crowds". We all know what happened after that. An innocent man was crucified.

What is truth? I know the "Who" of truth but have not completely learned the what of it. I do, however, know what truth is not:

Truth does not twist information until it fits your own "take" on the matter.
and
Truth does not abandon a man to his own fate during his time of deepest need.

Please join me and my fellow bloggers in a Novena for Father MacRae starting this Monday, August 22nd and let us also ask Jesus to send the light of HIS truth and mercy upon Father MacRae and all involved in his case.

Sabbath Moments - Hmmm...I surprised even myself

2011-08-20T07:09:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

I haven't been posting much recently for various reasons. Yeah...some of these "reasons" have names and I'm sure many mothers can relate. My brain shuts down when there is too much noise...as joyful as those noises may be! Sooo, I took a bit of an unplanned break rather than spill out all sorts of nonsense on my blog. After all, if you can't beat 'em you might as well join them. I surprised even myself! I hadn't gone inline skating for many years because of the Myasthenia Gravis but in the last 4 days I went skating twice and didn't even wipe out once! I didn't dare try it last summer right after my healing because my muscles needed strengthening after years of minimal use - I was out of shape. They've grown stronger and now:

Hurray! I can skate again!!

Something as simple as rollerblading or biking may not seem like a big deal to most people but after so many years of not being able to enjoy any sort of (fun) exercise... things like these are pure joy. Pure, unadulterated, joy.

Thank you, Jesus.

Their Angels see the Face of God

2011-08-16T22:12:00.000-07:00

Earlier today I read this interview with Corey Feldman, who is claiming that pedophilia is the number 1 problem for child stars. Many in Hollywood seems to be waving these accusations away but this isn't the first time he has spoken about this. Here's an article from 2008 where he also speaks about being abused, as does Corey Haim, his co-star who died in 2010. Whenever I read stories of children being sexually abused it sickens me to the very depths of my being. These children have to live with this horror for the rest of their lives ...if they make it that far.

I first met Diane C. when she came to work for my mom about 15 years ago. She was a tiny little thing, never grew much past four and a half feet. She suffered from a condition called Hypopituitary Dwarfism and even as an adult was about the size of a child of about 9 or 10. She showed me a picture of herself as a 7 year old and you wouldn't have taken her to be more than the age of three or four from the picture. She was abandoned by her mother not long after her birth and was raised by her father. She was also raped by this very same father around the age of three and was placed in a foster home. You would think that her problems would have ended there, but she was also abused both physically and sexually in 7 out of the 13 foster homes she lived in.... until she was finally placed with a wonderful woman during her teenage years. According to Diane, this was the only place where she ever received any kind of love or nurturing and she considered this woman her "mom". Diane loved dancing, working out, and had an sweet naivete to her that I still can't explain. She was also an alcoholic, despite trying to give up drinking many times.

I remember one day I pulled into my mom's driveway and saw Diane getting out of her car with tears running down her face. I asked her why she was so upset and she pulled out the picture of herself at seven years old. The picture showed a delicate featured, beautiful and very fragile looking child. I knew what this was about and reached out to hug her but she pulled away. "If you touch me I will break." So we sat on the front steps and I patted her shoulder until she calmed down. "Why, Mary? Why would God allow such things to happen to me?" I couldn't answer her question...I didn't know why. What do you say to someone who has been wounded so grievously time and time again? You can't spout platitudes like, "It will be okay." It's not okay. All I could say to her was "I'm so sorry, Diane, that anyone would ever do such a thing to you or any child. It's evil...pure evil, and they should be in prison." (I believe her father did spend some time in prison but not the others who abused her.)

Diane was also suicidal. My mom stepped in so many times and tried to get her help but because Diane was an adult there was only so much she could do. Many people loved Diane but she could never see herself as lovable in any way...the childhood wounds were too deep. I used to beg God to heal her. I know that my mother and father prayed for her all the time too.

I remember the day when I received the phone call that Diane had succeeded in ending her life. She was found in her bathtub by a friend. She had cut her own throat. I cried so hard. I was angry, too, for all the hurt and pain she suffered in her life. I was angry that the people who were given the charge to love her would brutalize a child in such a way. She was a human being, not a thing to be shuffled around from house to house and treated with such brutality.

I pray that God heals what we never could.

Shadow Girl

the gates of never-never land
you entered a broken reed
fallow the field of your youth
no seed of love sown therein
like a deck of cards
shuffled from house to house
where many skeletons lived
in dark cellar closets hidden
home a word you never knew
a tiny dancer lost in shadows
don't snap my wings you cried
i cried
if you hug me i will break
shattered you were, in pieces
too many cracks had weakened
the whole and you leaked throughout
a broken ship listing skyward
a fragile bird, prey for hawks
and other scavengers of the night
look both ways before you cross
too young I could not lead
with a shuttered heart
you could not follow

Please pray for children who have been sexually abused. I shared Diane's story so that people could see a glimpse of the pain those who are abused go through. I'd also like to recommend the book
Third Floor Window by Colleen Spiro. This book is not only for those who have been sexually abused ...it's a book for everyone who treasures the children of this earth.

"See that you do not despise one of these little ones, for I say to you that their angels in heaven always look upon the face of my heavenly Father." Mt 18:10

We Are All Interconnected

2011-08-10T16:16:00.000-07:00

I was thinking about The Mystical Body of Christ and how we are all interconnected through Him and I wanted to share a story, as strange as it is, which points to this fact. When I had Myasthenia Gravis I would often have "visual disturbances". Many times half my vision would cut out and I would not be able to see properly for a while.These disturbances are quite common in MG. Sometimes these came with headaches, sometimes not. A bit different from migraines,
I wouldn't get the "halo" effect and get headaches quite that severe but it was still hard to walk around when my vision would cut out, especially in public.

Last month, before we went on vacation, Randy, Michaela and I went out looking for a bathing suit for Michaela. We were at a local department store and I was in the fitting room helping Michaela try on swimsuits when all of a sudden...my vision cut out. I said, "C'mon, Michaela, we have to leave right now! Mommy can't see right." We dashed out of the fitting room and I told Randy what was happening and that we had to get out of there. He looked at me in shock and we left the store. When we got outside Randy this is what Randy said to me:

"While you were in the fitting room helping Michaela my Blackberry dinged so I went to check the new e-mail that had just come in. I read the e-mail, which was for you. You gotta read this."

I couldn't read it, of course, because I didn't have my vision back yet so Randy read it to me. A young woman who had been recently diagnosed with Myasthenia Gravis had written me an e-mail. Here are portions from some of her e-mails to me:

"I suffered from severe almost sudden weakness when I was 22 years old, I am 26 now. I take medication everyday for Myasthenia Gravis and I had a thymectomy a couple years ago and that has helped. I am a follower of Jesus Christ and a firm believer in His healing power!! I have never accepted that i will be sick for the rest of my life even though my doctors keep explaining that "MG is a chronic disease that you will have for the rest of your life so you just have to find a way to make your life as manageable as possible." I was very active before i was diagnosed. I have a black belt in Karate and played almost every sport, so needless to say this was a huge life changer and i was so weak at the beginning before I got officially diagnosed that I had fallen down the stairs, I couldn't talk, chew or even walk for most days. I have been on a mission to change my diet and try to exercise and find some way to fight this!! I have noticed some good changes due to my Gluten free diet but i know what it feels like to be normal and even though if feels like a lifetime ago I want that back!!! IN JESUS NAME!! I googled "Jesus healed my Myasthenia Gravis" and i was happy to read your blog explaining your experience being healed from this awful disease. I would love to hear back from you."

From another e-mail she sent after I had asked her to tell me more about her symptoms:

"I did have had the worst symptoms. I was working at target and started noticing that my hands were getting weak and it was difficult to straighten my fingers, I had to wear gloves at some points for work and could hardly get them on well I thought it was bad at first but had no idea how serious it really was.I didnt have insurance so i couldnt go to a regular doctor so when i went to ER the doc spent 5 mins with me and said that bc of my hand weakness he said that i had a "pinched nerve" and gave me a prescription for viacadin!!! i didnt even take it bc i knew he was wrong. I was on the computer looking different things up all the time and within a few short months i was having difficulty raising my arms and holding my head up. One night i was at my dads helping them move into a new place and I couldnt do much but that was not the kind of person i am so i pushed myself ( i know now that is why i became so weak) but i didnt know what is was so i thought i could just fight against it i guess. Well I was by myself unpacking and my neck became so weak that i couldn't keep my head up so i just broke down and literally got on my face and prayed and asked God to help me figure out what was going on ... so i got up of the floor and went to the computer where i had explored many other options but never really found the right one (vitamin B deficiency, seizures ,MS) but some how I at that time found the symptoms for a disease called Myasthenia Gravis and it described everything i had a symptom. That was the beginning and it progressed really fast.. but i have no pain just weakness, debilitating weakness.

To make a long story short i went over a year without medication with my body being so weak I was unable to shower without my husband bc he had to do everything for me. I had problems eating, talking, walking, it effected ALL of my muscles. I went to free clinic with the diagnoses that I MADE and a young helpful doctor FINALLY believed me and wanted to help me so he set up a blood test and within a week i was on medication.

There is a huge improvement from now to when i was first diagnosed but i have never accepted that i would be sick for the rest of my life!! I have fought and prayed and cried!! it has been a long difficult past few years.. and now i feel like something amazing is about to happen. I have talked to everyone in my family about you and shared your story and it really encouraged me!!! "

When Randy read her first e-mail to me... to say I was shocked is a huge understatement. What are the odds that I would have a return of one of the symptoms of Myasthenia Gravis at the precise moment that this e-mail came in? The odds seem slim at best. It was as if the Lord was giving me a nudge to pray for this young woman. But why such a strong nudge? This still puzzles Randy and I. My heart really felt for this young women as I could certainly relate to her suffering. She was not the first person with Myasthenia Gravis to write to me but the other woman had a relatively mild case compared to A. Most people would simply chalk this up to coincidence but I no longer write stuff like this off so easily.

Myasthenia Gravis can be life threatening. Those with severe cases can have "breathing crises" and can die from these. I warned her in an e-mail that if this should ever happen to make sure that her husband called an ambulance immediately. I am praying for A. and I am hoping that some of my fellow bloggers might join me in praying for her. We are all part of the Mystical Body of Christ and through our prayers we can all assist each other here on earth and our prayers for those who are battling terrible diseases can bring healing and help when they need it most.

Meme - What Would Your Patronage Be?

2011-08-08T13:56:00.000-07:00

The idea for this meme began with The Curt Jester's post, Saintly Planning .

In her efforts to kindly assist us all in planning (very funny, Puff) for our hoped for sainthood, Puff from Puff's Blog About Stuff brings to us this meme:

Assuming you are a saint, and your cause has been executed, your miracles confirmed, your date on the calendar established, all that is required is to select that of which Holy Mother Church will name you Patron (ess) of.

For this meme, you must name your patronage
and then tag 5 other people who would like to play along.

Linking your answer to your nominator's post would make it easier to get your answers.

After reading the post over at The Curt Jester my chances of ever being canonized are slim at best : ) Though one never knows - perhaps I pull a Saint Augustine at some point, or maybe one of the other "wicked saint" maneuvers. Still, it's probably best to presume I was martyred for the Faith for some reason. Yes, that's it. I was defending the Eucharist while infidels were storming my parish and I died during the ensuing firestorm of bullets. (Did I ever tell you that St. Tarcisius was one of my favorite saints when I was young? Having practiced "dying in defense of the Eucharist" a thousand times as a child, this would seem a likely scenario. Lol!)

Sorry. I got distracted for a minute.

On a more serious note, I think I would be one of the patron saints of the chronically ill or those who suffer from depression and anxiety. Why? Because I can relate to their suffering and I already intercede for them anyway so I would just be continuing to do the same thing except in a greater way. I may have been healed of Myasthenia Gravis but I haven't forgotten just how difficult suffering like this can be.

I tag:
Colleen at Thoughts on Grace
Karinann at Daughter of the King
Kathryn at Heart for God
Anne at Imprisoned in my Bones
Barb at Suffering with Joy

Sabbath Moments - In Stock

2011-08-06T07:25:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

We have a used bookstore in town that contains a treasure trove of spiritual classics. I can often be found there digging through the shelves searching for books to read. They had so many books in stock this time that I had an easy time browsing for good ones. This week I picked up three books by C. S. Lewis, a book by Mother Teresa, and a book about St. Padre Pio for just over a dollar a piece. What a bargain! The one by Mother Teresa is called Words to Love by...

In one section of the book she speaks about families. Here are a few words from her:

Love begins at home.
If we do not love one another who we see 24 hours
how can we love those we see only once?
We show love by thoughtfulness
                      by kindness
                      by sharing joy
                      by sharing a smile...
Through the little things.

A little child has no difficulty in loving,
has no obstacles to love.
And that is why Jesus said, "Unless you
become like little children...."

Mother Teresa's words are always simple and filled with wisdom. I have read some of the passages
in this book over and over again. Not because they are difficult to understand, but because they are so
filled with truth and beauty it just makes a person want to savor them and reflect on them more deeply.

I'll end this post with a picture Randy took while we were visiting an amusement park this week.

I am quite sure this is NOT what Mother Teresa meant by love. But...hey...you have to discipline your kids somehow and I'm against spanking :-)

Come, all ye who thirst

2011-08-05T11:54:00.000-07:00

A warning for all those who are sticklers concerning children and their behavior at Mass:

Do not read this story.... it will offend you. As for everyone else, read on if you'd like : )

When I was responding to comments on my last post I remembered an incident that took place when my daughter was almost 2. One day at Mass I was in my usual spot at the back of the church trying to pay attention to my prayers while also keeping my eye on my toddler who was walking back and forth inspecting church bulletins and picking up lint and various other stuff off the rug back there. She always had a fascination with the marble Holy Water font and I often spent much of my time trying to keep her away from it. While caught up in praying the Our Father back there, I lost sight of my daughter for a split second. Well...
all those with children realize that a split second is all it takes. When I glanced over, her cupped hands were dipped into the Holy Water font and I bet you all can guess what she did next, can't you? Yep, that little tot, in spite of her mom's "Noooo! Don't do it!" ..... did it. She hurried and raised those cupped hands to her little mouth and drank it. That same Holy Water that thousands of people had recently dipped their hands into was now in my little angel's (wink, wink) tummy. To say I was horrified is an understatement. I picked her up and scolded her asking her why she would do such a thing.

"But, Mama, I was firsty."

I guess one could call this "living waters" as I suspect that water was indeed teeming with life of every sort.

I won't bother telling you about the time she unscrewed a large screw from a kneeler. It's a good thing the Church doesn't excommunicate two-year-olds.

Children and Mass - A View from the Other Side of the Pew

2011-08-03T17:36:00.000-07:00

Earlier today I read a post which spoke about distractions at Mass along with a few other issues. Nothing wrong with this post - I understood what the author was trying to convey as it's something we all experience from time to time.

And then I read the comments. I don't know why I did this. I should have known better but as a mother I wanted to see how people viewed parents who bring their children to Church. It was like stepping into a mine field! The poor author must have been shell-shocked when he saw the number of comments he received after simply speaking about his distractions during Mass. I am writing this in hopes of giving folks a slightly different perspective on children and Mass. Some of the comments, including some from fellow Catholics were beyond lacking in charity, they sickened me. My heart fell to my stomach before I was even halfway through this section. To be honest, it left me reeling and wondering if some of these folks need a reality check and to know that what they may see at Mass is often only a small portion of what can be a much larger picture.

I am one of those "self-absorbed creeps" who bring their child to church and struggle to contain their child's behavior during Mass. As the mother of a child whose "brain works a bit differently" I have to contend patiently with "hand flapping", "body swaying", singing at the wrong times and various other behaviors which some folks have deemed "inappropriate" by, and let me stress this, their own standards. Not God's standards certainly - having created children He certainly knows how their minds work. When my daughter was small, before I understood the difficulties Mass presented for her I used to reprimand her each week. We practically lived in the back of the church. I was trying to keep my child's behavior from "offending" a few people so I rarely got to hear an entire Mass. I didn't understand at the time that "stillness" was beyond her capabilities and the problem was with ME not her. After months of reprimanding she became afraid to go to church, and after a Mass of swaying and odd noises, before I could say a word she would look up at me hopefully and say, "Did I do a good job? Was I good at Mass?" Later, I began to understand that she was trying, in her own little way, to be on her best behavior during Mass.

"Mama, I said all the prayers and sang all the songs! Did you see?! Did you see?!"

I had not "seen" at all - I was too busy feeling embarrassed and angry watching my daughter sway back and forth for 15 minutes to notice how she was pouring her little heart out to God in prayer and song. My prayer at the time was, "Please Lord! Can't she behave at Mass just once!"

Then God showed me an inner "picture" of myself and I was struck dumb by my selfish prayer and "unlovingness". I was the one not "behaving" well at Mass. I was the one "lacking", not her. What I was lacking was love. God was pleased with her prayers and her unique way of worshipping Him. Even as I write this tears are welling up in my eyes at how I could be so blind as not to notice her efforts and that I could focus so much on her (what I perceived to be) flaws, rather than to understand that God loved her special way of praying to Him.

I look at her differently now. When she flaps her hands I imagine the wings of her angel softly flapping with her and when she sways and sings to herself even after the hymns are over I am reminded of the unending hymn of praise which always surrounds the throne of God.

For those who are offended by my child's behavior I can only suggest this:

It may do some good to search your own heart. The things which irritate us so much often come from an area of our own hearts which are closed off and lacking in love. One thing I am certain of is that God WANTS his littlest ones at Mass. They are his delight. Yes, if a baby is screaming the church down, by all means, bring him to the back until he is calm. But let's not nitpick, either. In my life I have noticed that most of the time when I get completely frazzled by the actions of another the fault lies within me. We cannot change others but we can change ourselves. It seems likely to me that a crying baby is music to God's ears. What is crushing to Him, are the silent ones who are never even given the chance to let out their first wail. Rather than praying that parents not bring their babies to Mass and asking them to "please remove your children" when we get irritated, why don't we pray for an end to abortion and end the silent screams that are piercing the heavens day and night. These have become a continuous echo in the ears of God. Do not ask God to spare your own ears....rejoice that there are still children left to disturb them.

An Invitation and a Welcome

2011-08-03T11:21:00.000-07:00

Today I posted about apathy versus holy indifference on Community of Catholic Bloggers. For those of you who have not yet visited this new site I invite you to stop in and take a look around this new blog which is the result of the group effort of a number of Catholic writers. I'd also like to welcome our newest author, Isaac from Praeceptorum Deus to the community. Here's a link to his first post for the Community of Catholic Bloggers.

Welcome aboard, Isaac!

Ouch! Get thee behind me Google!

2011-08-02T19:39:00.000-07:00

How come Randy gets word verifications like "fromtheiam" and I get words like "puddlepoo"? Yesterday he actually got the word "bible" as a verification word. My mouth dropped. "You are lying, buddy! Noooo way on earth did you get bible!" He just smirked. I peeked over to the laptop and there it was - "bible".

Once I actually got the word "bigrump" for a verification word. Beat that one, folks. I was a tad offended that Google would refer to my behind in such a way. Politically correct they are not.

A word to the wise:

You would be booted off Webkinz in a flash for that one...and Club Penguin would bar you for at least a month.

Don't Give Up - For a Special Blogging Friend

2011-07-31T18:09:00.000-07:00

don't give up
'cause you have friends
don't give up
you're not the only one
don't give up
no reason to be ashamed
don't give up
you still have us
don't give up now
we're proud of who you are
don't give up
you know it's never been easy
don't give up
'cause I believe there's a place
there's a place where we belong

"No, in all these things we conquer overwhelmingly through him who loved us." Romans 8:37

Living the Good Life

2011-07-31T17:46:00.000-07:00

Cocoa getting ready for bed :) Sweet dreams!

You didn't think dollhouses were just for dolls, did ya?

Sabbath Moments - O God Our Help in Ages Past

2011-07-30T06:11:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

Last week when I posted my Sabbath Moments I spoke about the changes in my spiritual routine during the summer months and my thoughts on this subject. Every week is different during the summer months and I pretty much go with the flow. I managed to sneak out during the evening hours a couple of times. I hopped into my car, went for a little drive and prayed and sang to the Lord. I usually sing while doing my dishes but I have had a lot of kids around lately and wanted to spare their ears. After a few days of sparing their ears I was dying to get out and pour out some songs to the Lord. It brings me joy despite the fact that my singing may be off key. We can't all be a Charlotte Church! (lol)

I guess I have a little evangelist living with me. She made up little Psalm cards and handed them out to Randy and I, her grandparents, and my sister and her family. Here's a picture of mine :

This is from an old hymn by Isaac Watts and it
paraphrases Psalm 90. She must have seen this
at a bookstore we visited while at the beach. I
love Psalm 90, especially verse 12 "Teach us to count our days aright, that we may gain wisdom of heart." I guess she must have thought it would be
a good reminder to all of us to place our trust in
God.

Today I was smiling because she was telling me that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. I asked her how she knew that and she replied, "Don't you pay attention to the readings at Mass, Mom? St. Paul says it all the time!" To be honest, I thought that she didn't really listen that closely to the readings. She went on to tell me that the Mass readings, Communion, and the singing were her favorite parts at Mass. I knew she loves singing because she always lifts her little voice at Mass. A few times I've even seen her place her hand over her heart while singing. Anyway, the moral of this story is:

I guess you can fidget and still pay attention at the same time : )

Actual Grace

2011-07-29T11:33:00.000-07:00

When praying to the Lord I often request "actual graces" . I love this term for some reason and I've noticed that when I pray for these "actual graces" God always grants them as long as I am praying in accord with His Will for me and in regard to my station in life. As far as I can tell, He has never refused this request though it is quite likely that I have failed to respond to them when given. Actual grace is a bit different than sanctifying grace. I like to think of actual grace as "the grace of the present moment". Not being a theologian I realize that this definition is a bit off so here (and here) are more precise explanations of actual grace and the help it provides us. These special graces are given to us to help us, in a supernatural way, complete a task God is asking of us. He gives us "a leg up" so to speak. They are temporary and not to be confused with sanctifying grace, the grace which communicates supernatural life into the soul at baptism.

I have noticed in my own life that the more often I ask for and respond to "actual grace" the more I get. God is generous in his giving. I call it the "grace of the present moment" because it is in the present that I receive this help from God. Certainly, I can pray for the "actual grace" to accomplish an important task tomorrow but I don't receive the special grace until the precise time it is needed.

There is a certain purity attached to the present moment. Each new day becomes a clean slate to write on. What we write on this slate is up to us. The term "present" has not gone unnoticed by me and as we unwrap the gift of today may we remember to treasure this gift and give thanks because the gift tag contains the signature of the Almighty God.

"This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice in it and be glad!" Psalm 118:24

His Daughter

2011-07-26T20:11:00.000-07:00

Each week, Holly at A Life-Size Catholic Blog hosts a meme called Pay it Forward where you can highlight another blogger or share with others posts from blogs that you would like to draw attention to.

My Pay it Forward this week goes to Karinann at Daughter of the King. Her blog is one of my personal favorites and her writing inspires me. I don't only read her posts, I "feel" her posts and that, to me, is the mark of someone who truly loves the Lord and is writing from the heart. Karinann is not afraid to speak the truth and I'd like to point everyone toward a particular post of hers called We are at War. Another post that struck me powerfully is God is the Lord. Both these posts contain truths that we really need to hear these days. We live in a secular society that has mostly forgotten God and these two posts are eye-openers. I highly recommend this site.

Karinann also writes for the Association of Catholic Women Bloggers and the Community of Catholic Bloggers. Without Karinann's hard work the Community of Catholic Bloggers would never have gotten off the ground. Many, many, thanks for all that you do, Karinann.

Fishers of Men

2011-07-24T13:37:00.000-07:00

My husband, Randy, just started a new blog called Fishers of Men. Randy is a convert to Catholicism with a Baptist/Pentecostal background and has decided to write about his conversion experience and his journey to the Catholic Church. I have watched with amazement the guiding hand of the Lord in his life and the huge strides he has made spiritually thanks to God's grace. I hope you'll visit his site and welcome him to the Catholic blogging community.

Coincidentally, or maybe I should say God-incidentally my husband's first two word verifications were "objesauss" and "fromtheiam". When I saw fromtheiam my mouth dropped! Hands down the best word verification I've seen so far. We were dumbfounded! Does somebody plan these things? From the I Am, indeed.

Lord....you are too funny.

Sabbath Moments - Aridity and Manipulating God

2011-07-23T06:02:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the moments when we "let go and let God" and live in the present moment.

Hmmm. I was thinking about that "letting go and letting God" part of this meme and I am realizing that it's a good thing I participate in this meme because moms really have no other choice than to place everything in God's hands and go with the flow. Kids are unpredictable for the most part and their needs supersede our own. Since returning from the beach (where I had a nice little "spiritual routine" of daily Mass and prayer going) I am back to "winging it" where prayer is concerned. Far from being bad for me as I used to believe, this is actually good for me. How can praying less be good for me? Well, I certainly rely more on God during these times. My prayers often become less formal and more heartfelt. Shorter but sweeter, I guess you could say. Plus, I have come to realize that routine, which is normally good, can at times have a negative effect spiritually in that we can come to place more importance on the routine than on the God behind the routine. We can be "using" the routine itself as a source of consolation. A way to test this is to pay attention to whether or not you feel disturbed inside when your regular prayer/Mass routine is upset for a good while. If you ARE disturbed it's likely that your motives are not completely pure. So the Lord likes to throw a few "wrenches" into my daily routine so that I don't become complacent. Another factor that has come to my attention over the years are "prayer agendas". We all have these, whether we recognize them or not. Some are very subtle. Some are not : )

I have noticed that after periods of consolation during prayer, when a "dry season" sets in, that I sometimes try to reproduce, or maybe "recapture" would be a better word, these feelings by trying to do exactly what I did while they were happening. As embarrassing as it is to admit, I am well aware that I am doing it, too. As if God can be manipulated in such a fashion! The aridity and dry spells remind me that God is in charge at all times and I (now, at least) try to keep my peace regardless of the state of my prayer life. Note the word "try" because I am going to be very honest here:

Over the years I have thrown a number of what can only be called "spiritual tantrums" before the Lord. Just like a small child who doesn't get her way. Instead of remaining peaceful in the knowledge that God has all things well at hand at all times, in my spiritual pride I have allowed my emotions to "fly all over the place" when the Lord's will does not coincide with my own. At first I didn't realize I was doing this - until the Lord brought it to my attention. I was lacking in the trust and faith which are crucial to a Christian and important to our spiritual growth and it would result in my losing the interior peace that God gives us. I would get all nervous and upset over things in life that I had absolutely no control over. The thing is that God reveals things in layers and I was not aware at first of this "manipulation". As He has worked on the healing of my emotions over the years more and more of this kind of behavior has come to my attention. Some of the things He has shown me surprised me. "Now, Lord, why didn't I notice I was doing that?"

God hides a lot of things from us. Were He to reveal our sinful natures all at once we might be thrown into despair and He doesn't want that so He peels the layers off slowly. He purifies all aspects of our nature provided we allow this and it usually takes a lifetime. This is one of the reasons why we shouldn't judge others. Often, the very same faults lie in us.

My Sabbath Moment was originally going to be about my vacation but I somehow got sidetracked.

The vacation was great, by the way.

My Summer Prayer Routine

2011-07-22T11:57:00.000-07:00

Here's a brief glimpse into my prayer life during the summer months:

"Eternal Father I offer You..."

"Mom! May I have a drink please?"

Get said drink.

"the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of...

"Come quick! You'll NEVER believe what Zeb did all over the kitchen floor!!" Errr...yes I WILL believe it - I can smell it from here. Zeb is our very old, deaf, senile dog who, I kid you not, poos in threes. Always. In some ways this is helpful since if I only find two, I simply look at the bottom of my shoe and most of the time the third is there. "If you know he goes in threes, why not walk around it?" you may ask. Well, it's really not that simple. We have a tile pattern on the kitchen floor that is light but contains a dark diamond shape in the center and I'm sure you know where the missing one lands - right in the center of that diamond. In other words, it's camouflaged. My husband swears to me that Zeb does it on purpose, "Hon, what are the odds that one of them will land in the center of the diamond almost every single day?"

He's got a point there.

"Your dearly beloved Son, our.."

Crash!!! I jump up and run into my daughter's room to find her under a pile of games after trying to remove the bottom game from the pile that is in the top of her very messy closet.

Sigh.

"Where was I Lord?"

Thank you

2011-07-20T09:19:00.000-07:00

Many, many, thanks to all who have been praying for Ron, Christopher, and their families.

Christopher is doing quite well. He has feeling and some control over his upper body which is a HUGE improvement all things considered. He is moving his right arm as well as his left and his vital stats are good. Unfortunately, there has been no improvement in the lower body. I think everyone was hoping to see some kind of response, even if only to touch, in the lower half, but nothing as of yet. Still, I have great hope:

All things are possible with God. I know this firsthand.

Sweet Jesus, thank you for the remarkable improvement in Christopher's condition. I praise your most Holy Name. I have complete faith in your ability to heal Christopher completely. Please send the fire of your Holy Spirit through the lower half of Christopher's body. He is a young man, Lord, and needs the use of his legs. I also place his family, who are suffering greatly, in your Sacred Hands.

Holy Mary, you who understand a mother's pain when her child is suffering, hold Laurie close and cover her entire family at this time with your Immaculate Mantle.

Jesus, I trust in you!

Christopher moved his arm!

2011-07-18T16:22:00.000-07:00

Christopher is conscious and moved his left arm and hand! Thank you, Jesus!

Christopher is awake and talking but very frightened because he has no feeling in his lower body at all. Still, his blood pressure is stable and he can move one arm. He cannot move the other arm but when someone touches his hand he can feel it which is a good sign. The next 72 hours are crucial according to the doctors and he will be undergoing another operation in a few days. Another good sign is that he can feel pain in certain parts of his upper body.

Thank you, everyone, for your prayers. Prayer is powerful and his family appreciates every single one. I spoke to Laurie's sister a little while ago and she said the prognosis is good that Christopher will live but may not be able to walk ever again. With God all things are possible so I am praying that, like the cripple at the Beautiful Gate, he WILL walk.

God is good.

I can't believe this....

2011-07-18T07:47:00.000-07:00

I don't know what's going on lately. First Jonna, then Ron, and now I get a phone call early this morning telling me that my friend Laurie's son Christopher was in a diving accident yesterday and broke his neck. He was in surgery for 8 hours during the night and survived the surgery but is in very critical condition. Laurie and I have been friends since we were two-years-old and I love her like a sister. Please, once again I am begging for prayer.

Jesus, you are the Divine Physician, please lay your beautiful hands, which were pierced for love of us, on Christopher and bring complete healing to this young man's body. Pour your mercy upon his entire family and hold them close during this terrible time. Jesus, I trust in you. You know all things and I place Christopher and his family into your most Sacred Heart.

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us!

Emergency prayer request

2011-07-16T19:57:00.000-07:00

Randy and I just returned home from the beach this afternoon. We rent a cottage every year from some friends that we've known since we were children. My sister who is still at the beach called me a little while ago and told me that our friend's son just committed suicide. The family is totally devastated. Please, please pray.

Sabbath Moments - Vacation

2011-07-09T04:57:00.000-07:00

Sabbath Moments is a weekly meme hosted by Colleen at Thoughts on Grace. These are the times when we remember to "live in the present moment" and "let go and let God". This has been fairly easy to accomplish this week as we are on vacation and surrounded by the beauty of God's creation. I'd like to introduce you to a little fellow who has been keeping us company at the beach this week:

This adolescent seal has been keeping us company for the past few days. He'll take off for hours but keeps coming back to the same spot on the beach. The picture is not very clear because they roped off a section of the beach so that no one would disturb the little guy. You can't see his face well in this picture but he is adorable.

Here's a picture of my favorite girl playing in the wet sand close to the water. Each day when we get back to the cottage a pound of sand pours out of her bathing suit before she steps into the shower : )

As for me, I formed a daily routine during my vacation that is working out very well. I leave the cottage at 8:00 to pray my Rosary and attend Mass at a nearby Church. They pray the Rosary daily at this parish before Mass and on Wednesdays have Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament. After Mass I return to the cottage and we head off to the beach. I like to read on the beach and am now reading a book called Consoling the Heart of Jesus. Great Book!

One of my sisters is here with her family and my brother and parents are back and forth depending on their work schedule. We have all been having a great time! Family, fun, and laughter...you can't beat that!

Black Sheep Dog or Beloved Child of God ?

2011-07-07T16:20:00.000-07:00

"Far worse than a good man who falls are the vultures who prey on him."

This post has nothing to do with Father Corapi's guilt or innocence and everything to do with our response to his situation. I read a comment left on someone's blog today that said, "Trial by blog is a curious thing. Personally, I would prefer trial by Canon Law." I have to say, after reading a few articles about Father Corapi (one of which has been removed) that this comment well describes what often happens in the Catholic blogosphere whenever a new scandal arises. To be truthful, I am often more scandalized by the lack of mercy which is often aimed at those who fall than the fall itself. All that I can surmise from some of the comments that lean toward the cruel side is that - either the person making the comment somehow escaped the repercussions of the fall of Adam and Eve and has never fallen into sin or that they are so angry that they can't be impartial when they read about these scandals. My greatest fear is that a few of the negative comments may stem from glee over a man's possible fall from grace. The way a few are worded certainly can leave one with this impression.

Father Corapi may be guilty of the accusations against him, I do not know. What I do know is that this man should be "prayed for" rather than "preyed on". If the accusations are true, does this negate the incredible work this priest has done and the thousands of souls he has brought to Christ? Are there many who have listened to him that have NOT been moved into a deeper relationship with the Lord through his words? Are we really surprised that satan unleashes huge attacks on priests? I am not defending Father Corapi's actions if he is guilty, I am saying that Jesus loves Father Corapi and died on the Cross for him and all the rest of us sinners. Father Corapi is a sinner, I am a sinner, you are sinner and as Jesus said, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."

Prayer should always be our response in these situations. All priests need heavy duty prayer support. During this month devoted to the Precious Blood may we ask the Lord to cover these shepherds in a special way and may we plead the Blood of Christ upon each and every one of them.

"Am I my brother's keeper?" Gn 4:9

"So on we go, his welfare is my concern
no burden is he to bear, we'll get there.
And the load doesn't weigh me down at all.
He ain't heavy...he's my brother."

(Lyrics by The Hollies)

The Tortoise and the Hair

2011-07-05T07:25:00.000-07:00

I attempted to get this post up yesterday but, unfortunately, the Tortoise is on vacation with me. The Tortoise is our ancient laptop which works so slowly that this post that was supposed to go up yesterday decided to wait until today. He's a stubborn little critter and needs a lot of coaxing. I threatened to toss him in the trash so he decided to cooperate with me today. I updated the post a bit and instead of wishing everyone a "Happy Independence Day" yesterday:

I hope everyone HAD a wonderful July 4th! We are on vacation at the seashore for the next two weeks and you wouldn't believe how packed the beach was today (errrr, yesterday, that is) - they predicted a crowd of 150,000 to 200,000 on the local beaches today (yesterday) and I think the forecasters were right on target. We were packed like sardines! Crowded beaches aren't my favorite thing but Michaela wanted to go to the main beach today, so we agreed. Yesterday (the day before, actually) we went to a much more secluded spot. Randy fished, the kids played, and I read on the beach. I did dip my feet in the water but they instantly went numb (those who live in the Northeast know what I mean) so I hobbled back to my chair and let the kids turn into ice cubes along with my husband. Charity, in my case, does not extend to walking out of the ocean with a ice cube stuck to your nose. (The Lord certainly agrees with me on this one - He knows all about walking ON TOP of the water rather than in it. Peter on the other hand....)

Oh yes ...the hair. I forgot about the hair. Likely it will have all fallen out by the end of the summer so perhaps I need not worry about it after all and can begin anew :)

I hope everyone had a great weekend!!

In honor of the Sacred Heart

2011-07-01T20:13:00.000-07:00

I owe my conversion to the most merciful Heart of Jesus. Here is my conversion story in verse:

The Weeping Rose
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hiding behind my fig leaf

Cowering in the shame of Eve

I, too, consumed fruit forbidden

Sweet to the lips; bitter to the soul

And mourned outside Eden's gates

An earthen vessel, Adam's seed

Lost in the dust of time

A rose wilted for lack of the Son

"Where are you?", echoed in my soul

At the faintest, "here i am"

A broken arrow, a crooked bow

Stood before the Mercy Seat

Unbathed, covered with grime

Unrecognizable to all but You

Your eyes pierced through the filth

And saw the swan in the ugly duckling

You tucked my heart into your side

Two hearts beat as one

And in this Sacred Chamber

A weeping rose unfurled her first petal

You can find my written conversion story here - Heart of Jesus Infinite in Mercy - or perhaps I should say that this is where it all began, because conversion is a lifelong process. Many of you have already read this but I have never quite ceased being amazed at the tremendous gift of mercy I have received and I am putting up the link in honor of Jesus' Sacred and Merciful Heart. The gift of mercy He gave me changed me forever and I will always be grateful for his love and kindness.

Jesus, my heart is forever yours.

St. Margaret Mary and St. Faustina

2011-07-01T19:25:00.000-07:00

I've always been struck by the similarities in St Margaret Mary's revelations of the Sacred Heart and the revelations to St Faustina of the Divine Mercy of this same Heart. I've always felt that the words of Jesus to St. Faustina were a "completion" of the messages He gave to St. Margaret Mary. The words are very similar in nature and I believe were meant for our times. Mark Mallett has written a post called
The Last Effort concerning these two great saints and the cohesiveness of the messages for the world given to them by Jesus himself.

O Lord! Not the purple one please!

2011-06-30T17:52:00.001-07:00

My daughter has been staying up rather late now that school is out for the summer and last night we had all brushed our teeth and were ready bed and were chatting about our day. Michaela was regaling us with tales of the fun things she did that day. At one point during the day she and her two friends were in the bathroom washing their feet - 'cause let me tell you...these kids' feet were black with grime. So...my daughter was telling us (after we had gotten ready for bed) how dirty the water was from their feet and then piped up, "Oh, yeah... and I forgot to tell you, Grace knocked a toothbrush into the toilet." My husband and I looked at each other and our mouths dropped open. Michaela looked at our stunned faces and said, "But don't worry, I fished it out!"

And would you like to know how I can tell that I still have a long, long, way to go with regard to charity? Because the whole time she was telling this tale "yours truly" was hoping that it was my husband's toothbrush :)

I'll never tell who the lucky one was. But I heard DID hear my husband mumbling under his breath when he walked away and it sounded an awful lot like, "No wonder my breath smells like cr-p."

True story, folks. And the moral of the story is:

Always put your toothbrush back in the toothbrush holder after you brush your teeth.

Heart to Heart

2011-06-27T16:31:00.000-07:00

The Eucharist is truly the "Heart" of the Mass. When we receive Communion we are receiving the Heart of Jesus. A number of Eucharistic miracles have pointed to this fact over the years. Here is a link that speaks about one of these miracles - Modern Day Miracle of the Eucharist. As in Lanciano where the host was tested and found to contain heart tissue so, too, in this more recent Eucharistic miracle the host that was studied was found to contain this same tissue.

We've all heard the phrase, "You are what you eat" but I'd like to point you toward another great article on the Eucharist called Christ's Unfathomable Love. This takes "You are what you eat" to a whole new level!

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of the Eucharist. That you share with us your own Divine Heart is indeed...unfathomable.