Tuesday, February 4, 2014

The Cure for "Double Yoke Syndrome" Part 1

Hope in a Prison of Despair: Wikimedia Commons



The food we feed our minds and the things we tell ourselves make a great deal of difference in whether our cross feels light or heavy. Half the problem with feeling doubly yoked is what we believe about ourselves and others mixed with what we may not believe nor trust about God. I joked around in my last post about people feeling doubly yoked but there's a great deal of truth mixed in with my rather lame attempts at humor. Many people do feel overwhelmed and weighed down but the truth is that feeling heavily burdened is often the result of a lack of hope.

Despair is the heaviest thing in the whole universe. Even a little bit is hard to carry.

What we believe or disbelieve about ourselves can leave us locked into patterns of living that make it more difficult to respond to God's freely given grace. If we don't believe that we, or others, or even a situation, can change we have the tendency to slam the door on grace. Very often there are hidden areas of hopelessness in our lives that God yearns to touch deeply with his grace but because of the things we believe about ourselves and others we keep the door closed through our own hardness of heart. A strong and stubborn belief can be a hard obstacle to remove. It can be done but we have to ask God to open up these painful wounded areas to hope. As in "Lord, please pour your hope into this area. I have difficulty believing I can/she can/he can change and I hand it over to you. Touch this part of my life with your grace. May the light of  hope cast its rays on the dark corners of my heart and may your love be the balm that heals this brokenness within me. "

Basically, when we don't trust fully in God or his word, we end up with hidden areas of despair in our hearts. We discount grace. We believe in a cheap grace that is not powerful enough to effect change in ourselves or others.

Hope is a "power" virtue and a "living" virtue. Without hope touching every aspect of our lives parts of us crumble and die inside. The easiest way to destroy someone? Strip them of their hope. Anyone who has ever lived in a state of despair can understand the debilitating effects of a lack of hope. Hope grows things... hope nourishes faith and love and brings about their full flowering.

Those of you who are gardeners have probably heard of "companion planting". This is when we group certain plants together to increase their strength and ability to survive and bear fruit. The same is true in the garden of your heart: faith, hope and charity work together to nourish the soul. These are virtues that God has infused in our hearts. Here on earth, they work in tandem. Strip one away and the others begin to fail.  When virtues fail like this we leave space in our hearts for the Seven Deadly Sins to set in. They are the "weeds" in our gardens and if not removed tend to take over the whole thing.

When I began praying for hope to light up all the areas in my life I felt hopeless about I began to see huge changes in my life. It doesn't matter the size of the issues you are despairing over, large or small He wants to open these areas to the light of hope.



"For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare, not for woe, plans to give you a future full of hope."              Jer. 29:11

"And hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us."               Rom 5:5

22 comments:

  1. No words; you've said this so well. Thank you.

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  2. What you didn't say speaks volumes :) Thank you, Nancy!

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  3. Thank you Mary for this post. It is hitting me in the heart right now and I will pray that prayer you pray for hope to light up all areas in my life. Hope has been lacking in my heart lately.

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    1. I will join you, Monica. Thanks for commenting :)

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  4. What's the point of having a Savior who walks on water if we're not prepared to follow Him?

    The reason we sometimes do not trust God fully is because we're afraid to lose control. Can you imagine if I said "Thy will be done" and truly meant it; and then His will was something I did not expect or cannot tolerate? I learnt that the hard way!

    It was God's will that Paul should fall off his horse and go blind; it was His will that Paul and Peter were imprisoned and beaten; and Stephen was stoned to death. Did they or any of the early Christians say "Enough of that. God's will is not good for your health?" No; they trusted God fully; even on to death.

    It's very difficult for us to do the same; but it should not stop us from trying.

    God bless.

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    1. Exactly! We don't want to let go of the reins of our lives! And why don't we want to let go of the reins? Because we don't REALLY trust Him, do we?

      The saints are beautiful examples of trust in God. We can learn a great deal from them. Great comment, Victor.

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  5. Okay, so I had a comment about God's permitting will versus His explicit will above but it was getting too complicated so I deleted it. But I wanted to say that because God permits certain things that doesn't mean that it is His perfect will. They are allowed by Him because free will exists.

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  6. "Hope grows things... hope nourishes faith and love and brings about their full flowering." Love that! Beautiful post, Mary! I often forget to pray for more hope. I think it's the most neglected of the three theological virtues,...at least by me. Will start changing that tonight. Thanks, Mary! xo

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    1. Hi Patricia,
      I think you may be right about hope being the most neglected out of the theological virtues. I know I forgot to pray for it for many years with the exception of the three Hail Mary prayers for faith, hope and charity in the Rosary. Thanks for commenting, my friend! Hugs to you too!

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  7. Regarding your deleted comment: God permits certain things to happen. This is not the same as saying He "makes" them happen. He does not make disasters happen for instance. Sometimes, it is man's actions (man's free will) that make disasters happen or bad things to happen.

    When God permits/allows bad things to happen, it is often for the good. When He allowed Paul to be imprisoned, eventually, the prison keeper and his whole family were converted to believe in God by Paul. This conversion would not have happened if Paul had not been imprisoned.

    I have known many instances where bad things happened (and were allowed by God) and through them good resulted for others.

    God bless.

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    1. Thank you, Victor! That was beautifully said! And much easier to understand than the mess of a comment I deleted...lol.

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  8. Companion planting in the garden of our heart! I love that! Your vision of faith is so perfectly clear. Thank you, Mary, for guiding others along the path of faith with such wisdom.

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  9. I'm glad you liked the post, Anne. Thank you for your encouraging words as well!

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  10. Hi Mary! I have been thinking about that quote from St. Paul, that we should all be 'prisoners of hope.' Why be a prisoner of despair? It sure isn't any fun. And with faith, hope and love, I can stay in that happy prison with the saints of old.

    Nice to be here as always :)
    Ceil

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  11. Hi Ceil,
    And it's nice to "see" you here :)
    Yes, prisoners of hope! Great comment - I have the sneaking suspicion that if we really, really knew God and trusted his word that it wouldn't matter where we were. (Though, Lord, this nice warm house is quite fine too...just saying. Lol.)

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  12. "Despair is the heaviest thing in the whole universe. Even a little bit is hard to carry."
    Very well put. And, as you say, the only way out is surrendering completely to God so he can take on the burden. Thank you for this beautiful post.
    -Jim Milliken
    http://vitafamiliariscatholica.blogspot.com/

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    1. Hi Jim,
      Thank you for visiting my blog - I appreciate your feedback!

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  13. Thanks for this post. It's easy to let despair crowd out our awareness of all the blessings we have sometimes. i try to remember the prayer I learned from St Faustina and the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. The words are simply: Jesus, I trust in you. Keep up the good work here!

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    1. Thank you for commenting, Diane. I am a great fan of St. Faustina and have learned so much from reading her Diary! "Jesus, I trust in you" is an everyday prayer for me :)

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  14. So well done, Mary, with insights that should help many. Too often we say, "Here's my cross, Lord. I know you will help me carry it because you're the lead ox in this yoke...Oh, nevermind, I do it myself." If I had a nickle for every time I snatched back my unhealed areas I'd be a wealthy woman!

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  15. Thank you, Barb!
    Lol! People do like to be in control - I can relate to your comment!

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