Thursday, June 30, 2011

O Lord! Not the purple one please!

My daughter has been staying up rather late now that school is out for the summer and last night we had all brushed our teeth and were ready bed and were chatting about our day. Michaela was regaling us with tales of the fun things she did that day. At one point during the day she and her two friends were in the bathroom washing their feet - 'cause let me tell you...these kids' feet were black with grime. daughter was telling us (after we had gotten ready for bed) how dirty the water was from their feet and then piped up, "Oh, yeah... and I forgot to tell you, Grace knocked a toothbrush into the toilet." My husband and I looked at each other and our mouths dropped open. Michaela looked at our stunned faces and said, "But don't worry, I fished it out!"

And would you like to know how I can tell that I still have a long, long, way to go with regard to charity? Because the whole time she was telling this tale "yours truly" was hoping that it was my husband's toothbrush :)

I'll never tell who the lucky one was. But I heard DID hear my husband mumbling under his breath when he walked away and it sounded an awful lot like, "No wonder my breath smells like cr-p."

True story, folks. And the moral of the story is:

Always put your toothbrush back in the toothbrush holder after you brush your teeth.


  1. Mary...this was hilarious! Moral of the story...alway keep extra toothbrushes close by!!!
    Also, tell your husband to try some mouthwash for that cr*ppy breath!!! :oP

  2. Oh Mary! I am laughing! I'd be hoping it was my husband's toothbrush too. Just the thought...urrrg Thanks for the smile.

  3. Luckily, I always have extra toothbrushes on hand. Good thing mouthwashes kill germs, too. My only hope is that the toilet was flushed - ours is one of the kinds that you have to hold down the handle for a bit and I don't think the kids bother waiting. Gross, huh?

  4. Sue,
    I certainly giggled once I realized it wasn't my own toothbrush ;)

  5. Our younger kids have been caught using our toothbrushes for everything from scrubbing floors to cleaning their own teeth. We're pretty protective of our toothbrushes, now, but I still wonder about the times they must have replaced them unnoticed after their grubby games!

    Such a funny post, Mary. God bless:)

  6. And what if your daughter had not told you ....

    I remember a true story full of yuck!!!

    A young father stayed at home looking after his young daughter. She brought out her tea set and asked him if he wanted some tea. He said Yes whilst watching TV. Moments later she came back with a small cup full of water, which he drank; then another, and another.

    When later he told his wife she said: Do you realise the only place she can reach for water is the toilet!

    God bless.

  7. Credocatholic,
    You're welcome :) Another thing that made me laugh afterward was when she said (after looking at our shocked faces), "Don't worry! Don't worry! I washed my hands after!"

  8. Vicky,
    Funny! Kids don't care too much about germs, do they? Lol!

  9. Victor,
    I almost choked on my coffee while reading your story this morning! Randy and I were laughing so hard! That's the funniest story I ever heard!

    Well, you know how the old saying goes:
    Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger :)
    Thanks for the great laugh!

  10. ROFL! Mary, this is hilarious!! Love it, will have to share this one with my husband :) He will also think it's funny.

  11. Kathryn,
    I'm sure you read Victor's comment, also! Too funny! When my best friend's daughter was a toddler she caught her brushing her little teeth with toilet water! I guess these "toilet episodes" are more common than we think.

    I got your e-mail and will try to get your post lined up in a little while. I'm going to e-mail you later, too. God bless!

  12. Hi Mary,

    Just responded to your comments on my Blog.

    God bless.

  13. This is a well written piece of humor, and I admire the simple honesty of your daughter (she could have skipped the toothbrush tale entirely).

    But a while back, I was reading an article on the spread of whatever you flush, in the form of "spray", scooting out of the toilet and basically covering the entire bathroom with big time bacterial spray, on EVERY flush.
    I had never heard this before, and, well,...I am much older than your youngest daughter.

    I will not add links. Look for yourself and Google any form of "toilet flush spray how far" and there are so many articles, tests, proven fact, that it will make your hair stand on end.

    You may also begin a flush program with the lid down.

    That is still not enough. Get the brushes as far from the toilet as you can. Lysol the rest of the room often.
    I have seen clear lids for brushes that are hung to dry, and the lid covers all as you close it, but leaves the underside open for the brush to dry (bacteria do not grow well where it is dry; they grow in your toilet, sink, and tub best....floor...not so good for growth).

    My youngest sister bragged that she completed all of college without ever touching the toilet lid, but standing on her feet on the toilet.
    We roar at her story every time.

    Ever notice that Barber Shops put their combs in a blue solution?
    They are protecting one customer from others, who share the comb via barber.

    Get some of that junk (maybe Listerine?) and fill a glass to dip your brush in before you brush, even if it is protected.

    Just today, I almost commented on a co-ed bathroom at a workplace, where a single mom did not like the idea of men hearing her in a stall, or worse, going to the bathroom as men do, and then using the same door lock she does to enter, before he can wash his hands.

    My perspective came from being a single dad to baby girls, and deciding if they go to the men's room, or the other. (I chose men, and blocked the door after checking there was no one in the room. Good enough for the elder daughter (still single digit age) but the baby needed changed and there were no diaper dad spots.

    Getting a Royal Flush is as tough today as in all of human history.
    As for charity, well God bless God for creating bacteria.
    They are useful little critters often. But that's IT for charity on the topic!
    That will be two cents please, Mary. :-D

    Flush with confidence....say a Hail Mary too.
    I know of no Saint for clean toothbrushes....YET!

  14. Keystone,
    Ugh! I hate public bathrooms. Your youngest sister stood ON the toilet? Too funny!! When I used to have to bring my daughter to use public restrooms when she was small I used to hold her above them :) She's a bit too heavy for this now!

    Your Listerine idea is a good one. I never thought of dipping my brush in some before brushing. I have read about "toilet spray" and it grosses me out. I wipe down my bathroom in between heavy duty cleanings with Lysol wipes that are supposed to kill 99.8 percent of germs but I don't do this to the floor so it's probably germ ridden and disgusting. Closing the lid before flushing is a good idea!

    To be honest, I don't like to use co-ed bathrooms either. When I use a women's bathroom I see all woman wash their hands after but my husband says that not all men wash theirs.

    Ha! Ha! getting a Royal Flush is very difficult indeed!

    The check is in the mail, Keystone ;)

  15. Mary thank you for putting a smile on my face. Needed this.

  16. I'm glad it made you smile, JBR :) I'm leaving to go on vacation tomorrow but you will be in my thoughts and prayers. I think I'll have some computer access so I'll try to visit you. Hugs!!