Monday, June 25, 2012

Okay! Okay! 11 REAL Facts About Myself!

I've been accused of cheating on a meme by two of my fellow bloggers. One wears a kilt, the other likes rocking the boat so the pressure is definitely on to complete it. They threatened to sic the Blogmonster on me if I didn't comply, so here goes:

Here's my photo. Pardon my appearance - I had just awakened and am quite prickly before my morning coffee. As you can see, my most recent dye job didn't take and those stiff, wiry, gray hairs are still waving for attention like little banners in the wind (see Hair Anthem).

11 facts about myself:

1. I don't "cut the cheese" like Victor does, but I DO draw cartoons like a certain fiend I know. As a matter of fact, I love to doodle but am too embarrassed to put up any pictures because they are not much better than my speling.

2. My parents owned a bookstore when I was a kid but it went out of business after they turned it into a Christian bookstore. Says a lot about our country, doesn't it? And it was the only one in the city.

3. I eat sprouted grain breads, tabbouleh, green drinks, and lots of other weird stuff. Once I ate so many dandelion greens that a flower sprouted out of my ear. I ate that too.

4. You know that post I did about our septic tank a while back? We had it emptied only to find out that it was the neighbors "stuff" blowing in the wind all along. I offered it up.

5. I type with one finger which is why I cheated on the meme in the first place.

6. Not only do I have six gray hairs on my head - there is a stubborn, tough little bugger that keeps trying to grow out of my chin. This gained me entrance to the "Old Hags Club" along with Vicky and Puff. Feel free to join. These are the requirements:
~Must be at least forty (or close to it).
~ Must have a few strange wiry hairs growing in unusual places on the body such as the cheek, or one sprouting out of the chin that needs to be plucked (if one remembers because early Alzheimer's is another condition for membership).
~ Must look like a hag with dark circles under the eyes at least 7 days out of the week.
(Kindly,  Puff has offered a few of hers for those who don't meet the second requirement.)

7. I really do laugh at inappropriate times. Sometimes I laugh so hard I cry. There are some things I take very seriously though and my faith is one of them. 

8. I deliberately take breaks from the serious posts because if I didn't I would and do cry at what I see around me. These are not tears of joy.

9. When I was healed of the Myasthenia Gravis the Lord also healed my toenail fungus and a large  sebacious cyst on my head. In three days it was gone. And, yes, I'm serious. I was too embarrassed to mention it at the time :)

10. I am a watchman for those of you who know what this is. I didn't ask for this job but neither could I refuse it after all I've been given. I have a lot to be grateful for.

11. My daughter is a miracle baby.

And for good measure:

12. That white highlighting on my blog is driving me nuts. Kind of like my hair. I'm leaving it because I don't feel like removing it....yawn.


  1. Oh soooo cool! Love the porcupine pic with the saying...that might have to be *pinned*.

    Guess I will have to join the Old Hags Club *sigh*...thanks for the boost : )

    Hubby likes tabbouleh too...he is part Lebanese. I can't get used to it but love sprouted grain breads.

    Enjoyed...thanks for sharing and making me laugh...few peeps can do that LOL!

  2. I love love love this post. Love the humor that helps when we must see and deal with the serious side of things. Still laughing at the picture I have of you chomping on the dandelion flower dangling from your ear. Glad to have some company (finally) in the old hags club. I am a founding member. I really "get" your number 8... if we had to see all of the things around without something to lighten us up, I truly think we would implode. I love the story of your miracle baby - THANKS BE TO GOD. And if I write any more, this comment will be longer than your post - but I've enjoyed what you wrote so much that we're all just lucky I'm keeping this to the bare minimum. (oh, and did I mention that I love this post...?)

  3. Hi Theresa,
    Pin away! I saw the funny photo you had pinned and couldn't agree more. I tried to like it but I have to sign up I guess.

    Hey, membership is free, Theresa, so don't knock it :)

    Trader Joes has awesome Tabbouleh! I have tried making it at home but the Trader Joes one is the best. Do you have that store near you?

  4. Wow ... thank you for these interesting facts Mary.

    I tried tabbouleh once. My mother used to make middle-eastern foods. We'll have a blog post about that some day perhaps. Fallafel, okra, foul medames, tahini, bisara ... I wonder how many of these you recognise.

    And you can draw too! Well, if I published one of my cartoons then so should you. Looking forward to seeing it.

    Mary, you're so right about laughing. It is a very sad and confused world out there, and sometimes laughter does shield us from all the evil that's around. That and prayers.

    We had two Christian bookshops in our town. Both now closed. Two churches have been turned into nightclubs. And a strip-club is about to open nearby.

    Mary you're a very blessed person having been miraculously healed and also the birth of your daughter.

    May He continue to bless you and your family.

  5. Mary,
    I actually liked your Fiend post(cheating or not :)I eat sprouted bread too.(and raw milk) As for tabouleh, well I grew up on the stuff. I too am half Lebanese, so my grandmother made it all the time.
    I will forgive you for stealing my portrait:) and I definitely qualify for membership in the Old Hags club.
    Thanks for raking us to the lighter side of things.

  6. Hi Nancy,
    Glad you enjoyed it :) Nothing wrong with being a member of The Old Hag Club - you've got plenty of company you know. I have a single whisker (no, I didn't say whiskey, Victor) that grows under my chin. I have to pluck that thing regularly because it just won't DIE. I could make a few other comments on misplaced hairs but I'll stop here ;) At least I'm honest, right?

    Yes, from reading your blog I'm sure #8 struck a chord inside you. If God didn't want me to mention the more humorous aspects of life He wouldn't have put them there, right? I need to "lighten up" now and then and love a good laugh!

    Yes, my "miracle baby" is a great gift from God :)

  7. Victor,
    Did you click on the blogmonster?! Yes, it's real! It's the ugliest creature I've ever seen (felt kind of bad for it really).

    I recognize Falafel, Okra, and Tahini- never tried the others.

    I've tried to scan some of my sketches but the scanner must be junk because they barely show up in my scan section. You can only half see them - they look so light. How do you get them on your blog?

    Yes to laughing, it really is good medicine :)

    Churches turned into nightclubs? Now that's REALLY sad, Victor.

  8. Karin,
    I sometimes drink raw goat's milk when I can find it :)

    Glad to have you in the Old Hag's Club. Any weird hairs yet? I know, I know...not by the hair on my chinny,chin,chin, would you reveal such a thing ;)

    Stole your portrait? Nope, that's me - I can tell by the stiff gray hairs sticking up. Course, I only have six, mind you. I added the others for special effect.

  9. Mary,

    You must put your pictures up:-) Do you do your cartoons in ink? If the pictures don't all scan well, try photographing them - they'll probably come out darker.

    I've got quite a feeling that you're being too modest about your talents, my fiend!! :-)

  10. Mary, I understand there's a program that can darken a little the outlines of a sketch, especially if the original is in pencil rather than ink.

    If you wish, you can e-mail me a sketch or two and my computer expert will try to see if he can make it slightly darker.

    God bless.

  11. Mary,

    You have a wonderful sense of humour. A great gift!

    Wiry hairs? Can a few of those raised warty like old age blemishes gain me free entry to the Old Hag's club instead?

    God bless!

  12. Hi Vicky,
    No, I do them with pencils. And I'm definitely not being modest about my talent as you shall see. When I was a child I could draw every cartoon character under the sun but when my hands got bad from the MG I didn't draw anymore. I picked it back up after my healing but it's mostly doodling whatever pops into my head. I'll try using a camera and see if they come out better. I never had art classes so my animals are off kilter :)

    This is why I enjoy when you speak about technique on your blog :)

  13. Victor,
    Thank you :) If photographing them doesn't work I'll send a few to you. I never use ink - well, unless I am doodling during a long phone conversation :)

  14. LOVE Trader Joe's...I am there on a weekly basis so I guess we will have to try it : )

  15. Mary you make me laugh, you have an amazing sense of humor!:) Fact 13.:)

  16. Hi Sue,
    Welcome to the club! Yes, those warty old age blemishes will gain you immediate entrance! Just what are those things anyway? I have two of them. Still, if you haven't got any of those weird hairs in strange places let me warn you - almost everyone I know has a few. You've just gotten lucky so far, I expect. Or it could be your fair skin and light hair that has allowed you to escape this. I am a quarter Greek and that's enough I think to allow these stubborn critters to pop out. It's weird though because I am a very unhairy person - I don't even have that blonde peach fuzz on my arms or upper legs. Scary though, imagine if these wiry hairs start sprouting everywhere!

  17. Let's just say I fit every criteria of the Old hags Club and the battle has been a bit "hairy". :)

  18. Hi Colleen,
    Unfortunately you can't join the Old Hags Club yet because you are not close to forty. However, I'm willing to lend you my chin hair (man, I hate that stubborn thing) and waive the rest of the requirements if you really would like to take part :) The Club membership comes with a free ticket to "Belly Pooches R Us" if that will sway your decision. I'll even throw in a free gift certificate
    for the Association of Insomniac Bloggers if you'd like. What say you? That would take care of the dark circles requirement.

    Anything for a friend is my motto.

  19. Theresa,
    Great store! Try it - even Michaela likes it! Have you tried the Sunflower Seed Butter? That's another favorite here, along with Balela (not sure if I spelled that right but its like tabbouleh with beans). I don't eat tons of meat so I try to get my protein in other ways.

  20. Karin,
    Join the crowd, my friend, join the crowd. I won't tell you where my most recent new hair sprouted but it is in a place where no hair should ever, ever be. I'm beginning to appreciate whoever invented tweezers very much. What? Am I growing fur all of a sudden? Worries me a bit :) I told the Lord that I would like to age gracefully but this hair thing is soooo not funny ;)

  21. Mary, it's so nice to get to know you this way. I love the humor. Another thing we have in common: healed toe fungus. And how could you eat the dandelion out of your ear? My children would have loved to pick that and blow it in my face. By the way, you've got me curious: what is a watchman/watchwoman to be P.C.?

  22. Scary Mary,
    (see Victor's comment on my blog- hehe! Sorry, Victor, I'm landing you in it, again - go hide, my friend)

    Here's the thing - see, I don't think those oddly sprouting hairs are particularly old hag cos I don't have them :-D:-D:-D (Mary, do you think you could you do that thing you do with the white highlight on that last sentence??). I
    actually think the hairs are a fiendish trait - this would explain everything...

    BTW, I didn't know you found those art posts useful. I thought they were boring and that you were just being kind in visiting. Maybe, I can do more.

    God bless, Little Hairy Fiend:-)

  23. Anabelle,
    I told you we have a lot in common :) Toenail fungus is hard to get rid of so I laughed when God cleared it so quickly. Lol on the dandelion - my daughter loves to blow on them too.

    Here's a link which bests describes a watchman and it also explains the Words for Our Times in my sidebar:

  24. My dear fiend Vicky,
    What? You think I didn't read that whole slew of comments on your blog?! Check your stats ;) That's why I spoke about Victor "cutting the cheese" on this post - he probably thought it referred to his post on cheese cutting. That is also why I linked to your Catholic cartoon - so people will see where your mind really is :) Not that I'm finished, mind you...

    Vicky, you may not have the weird hairs (yet) but what about the other stuff? I saw your "hag" self-portrait and you certainly fit the requirements. Besides, as I said in the post, Puff is willing to give up a few. She's a kindhearted soul.

    Why would I visit your blog to be bored? That's just plain silly, Vicky. Victor is right, you seriously underestimate your artistic gifts. Your photography is beautiful too but that's not something I can learn. I've always been a poor picture taker. I've enjoyed yours though - most of the photos you've posted are breathtaking.

  25. That is not a bad profile picture of yourself..... jk.

    I feel I am reading a transcript of "Mary....This Is Your Life."


  26. Hi Grace,
    Yeah, but it was right after I got up. Maybe I should brush my hair for a profile picture :)

    Yep, this is my life! Victor and Vicky wouldn't let me get away with cheating this time :)

    God bless you, my friend.

  27. Or I should at least brush my chin hair.

  28. Dear Miss Mary,

    I never follow links so I didn't know - thank you, dear fiend:-) - and what's stats? Is it some kind of creepy crawly that Ole Slewfoot passed on?

    Please feel free to keep the hairs:-) Actually, maybe I do have some hiding in the valleys of these wrinkles...

    And thank you for being more than kind, Miss Mary (meant sincerely and with no fiendish undertone:-))

    BTW what did you mean by your comment on my blog??? I don't understand:-| Take another look - I think you'll find Victor and I playing quite nicely together.

    God bless, Miss Mary:-D

  29. You just wanted to "buy" another comment on your other post. I'm in a good mood so I obliged :) What are you aiming for this time? A +1 or something?

    Did I say stats? The 1st s was supposed to be puddy but my keyboard is messed up. Tweet, huh?

  30. That one definitely gained you points:) Once you hit 40 you're playing with the "big boys".

  31. I just fownd yor blog and its grate


  32. Hiya Vickster! 33 now! yurs is grait to :)

  33. You are too funny, You know the meme you did a while back - about writing a funny post? You tagged me but, well, i just couldnt do it! I am not that funny!
    But i love to laugh!

  34. Hi Colleen,
    Glad it made you laugh! I "cheated" on this meme the first time so I had to add to it :)

    I don't always do memes either because they are so hard to do but I can't resist when they are funny ones. It gives me a break I guess :)

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